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So Hufflepuff is CLEARLY the best house...

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The Adder

Banned
So yeah. Gryffindors value courage, Ravenvlaws intelligence, Slytherin ambition. There are a lot of jokes about Hufflepuff being the C students of the HP universe, afterall, Helga Hufflepuff said she'd "take the rest."

So the sorting hat houses you based on 2 things. What you can do, and what you value. And we've seen it put values over skills. Capability, after all, can be nurtured and cultivated.

What is it that Hufflepuff students are suppossed to value most?

Busting your ass.

So yes, Hufflepuff is full of kids who got put there because they've got good hustle, but you know who else is there?

The genius who credits their intelligence primarily to hours of laborious study.

The athlete who's on the field running herself ragged every day.

The social climber making his connections and creating owed favors now instead of waiting for some dark lord to grace him with gifts.

Basically everyone who would have been in another house if not for the fact that they value putting their noses to the grindstone more than they value the way in which they do so.

And they have a network of lesser acheivers willing to work their asses off to help their more talented friends.

Hufflepuff is the house you join if you actually want to accomplish anything in life without having to be some chosen one or a person meant to aid in someone else's special destiny.
 

ibyea

Banned
How the fuck did that even happen again? She seems made for Ravenclaw.

People are complicated. I believe the sorting hat took a long time with her to decide. And when you see the stuff Hermione does starting from book 2, you see she is very bold.
 

SJRB

Gold Member
Coincidence perhaps, but we had a big discussion at the office just the other day as to which colleague would fit in which house.

Everyone agreed I'd be perfect for Slytherin, haha. I'll tell you what though, with me in the team there's no way the Dark Lord would've lost. I would've shanked Harry in his sleep or something.
 

Steamlord

Member
The entire house system is awful. Hogwarts needs to be taken to task for that shit but the Ministry also happens to be rotten to the core so that won't happen. That school is literally a systematized breeding ground for hate groups and mass murderers. Literally.
 

Arkeband

Banned
If there was one thing I thought was a misstep in HP, it was the fact that there were 4 houses but only two of them seemed to matter.
 

dreams

Member
I agree with your assessment. I have always thought that Hufflepuff gets a bad rap as being a "useless" house. Forever disappointed that I was sorted into Gryffindor instead of Hufflepuff on Pottermore :B

Off topic, but in my opinion, Slytherin is way too popular. Slytherin is where the emo kids who think they are super xcore edgy go. This is especially true of people who self-sort themselves into Slytherin IRL.
 

Escalario

Banned
AKA House Yamcha

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Of course Hufflepuff was the best house to be in.

Ravenclaw is full of back-stabbing know it alls. Slytherin guarantees you'll grow up to be baby eating villain or everyone at least thinks you are. Gryffindor is full of wannabe heroes who will end up in an early grave or have super high expectations put on them.
 

oxrock

Gravity is a myth, the Earth SUCKS!
How the fuck did that even happen again? She seems made for Ravenclaw.

Ravenclaw is best though. Griffindor is filled with jocks and Slytherin is filled with Satan worshipers.

You don't see many others with the courage to accompany Harry on his adventures! Seems to me that Hermoine was placed appropriately. As for jocks and Satan worshipers, not entirely sure what you were watching.
 
How the fuck did that even happen again? She seems made for Ravenclaw.


The Sorting Hat can sense the future and knew that if Harry was going to have Ron (Intellectual Blackhole) Weasley as his best friend, he'd also need to be friends with the smartest kid in school to balance him out so he doesn't immediately flunk out.
 

Stet

Banned
Hufflepuff is for the people who always wonder why they can't catch a break. The people whose grills get manhandled by their neighbours. The people whose lunches are stolen from work. The people whose hobbies are always maligned as "for kids". The people who can't make it work with a prostitute. The people whose sisters know distinctly what it sounds like when they masturbate. The people who can't abide having to apply for jobs in order to get them. The people who tattoo their own genitals because they procrastinated too long.

Hufflepuff: the people who will only ever become wizards at the age of 30.
 

Lunar15

Member
The concepts of the houses and the sorting hat were the most vile thing about Harry Potter. Felt like such a convenient way to say "hey like these people and hey don't like these people". Then she just kind of ran out of ideas and said fuck all for Hufflepuff.

Hufflepuff is for the people who always wonder why they can't catch a break. The people whose grills get manhandled by their neighbours. The people whose lunches are stolen from work. The people whose hobbies are always maligned as "for kids". The people who can't make it work with a prostitute. The people whose sisters know distinctly what it sounds like when they masturbate. The people who can't abide having to apply for jobs in order to get them. The people who tattoo their own genitals because they procrastinated too long.

Hufflepuff: the people who will only ever become wizards at the age of 30.

Haha, dying over here.
 

JDSN

Banned
I wish this movies had a subplot of the hat being a secret baddie meant to divide the houses to keep them from reaching their full potential by creating complacency and mediocrity.

But nope.

Hufflepuff is for the people who always wonder why they can't catch a break. The people whose grills get manhandled by their neighbours. The people whose lunches are stolen from work. The people whose hobbies are always maligned as "for kids". The people who can't make it work with a prostitute. The people whose sisters know distinctly what it sounds like when they masturbate. The people who can't abide having to apply for jobs in order to get them. The people who tattoo their own genitals because they procrastinated too long.

Hufflepuff: the people who will only ever become wizards at the age of 30.
48s7Ss0.gif
 

entremet

Member
The entire house system is awful. Hogwarts needs to be taken to task for that shit but the Ministry also happens to be rotten to the core so that won't happen. That school is literally a systematized breeding ground for hate groups and mass murderers. Literally.

Well, did you forget one of the key series plot lines?
 

zeemumu

Member
Hufflepuff is for the people who always wonder why they can't catch a break. The people whose grills get manhandled by their neighbours. The people whose lunches are stolen from work. The people whose hobbies are always maligned as "for kids". The people who can't make it work with a prostitute. The people whose sisters know distinctly what it sounds like when they masturbate. The people who can't abide having to apply for jobs in order to get them. The people who tattoo their own genitals because they procrastinated too long.

Hufflepuff: the people who will only ever become wizards at the age of 30.

No spell to remove tattoos from your junk though.
 

Angry Grimace

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says "does something taste funny to you?"
I still don't get why Lupin was telling Harry how James and Sirius were the height of cool and the biggest badasses ever. Like how is it even possible Harry (and Ron/Hermione by association) wasn't even cooler than his dad given that he was legit world-famous.
 
Hufflepuff is for the people who always wonder why they can't catch a break. The people whose grills get manhandled by their neighbours. The people whose lunches are stolen from work. The people whose hobbies are always maligned as "for kids". The people who can't make it work with a prostitute. The people whose sisters know distinctly what it sounds like when they masturbate. The people who can't abide having to apply for jobs in order to get them. The people who tattoo their own genitals because they procrastinated too long.

Hufflepuff: the people who will only ever become wizards at the age of 30.

I feel so burnt that my skin peeled away
 

aly

Member
Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw were the legit houses. The other two were terrible and likely to get you killed.

Hufflepuff is for the people who always wonder why they can't catch a break. The people whose grills get manhandled by their neighbours. The people whose lunches are stolen from work. The people whose hobbies are always maligned as "for kids". The people who can't make it work with a prostitute. The people whose sisters know distinctly what it sounds like when they masturbate. The people who can't abide having to apply for jobs in order to get them. The people who tattoo their own genitals because they procrastinated too long.

Hufflepuff: the people who will only ever become wizards at the age of 30.

Lmao.
 

RedShift

Member
If there was one thing I thought was a misstep in HP, it was the fact that there were 4 houses but only two of them seemed to matter.

Yep. I sorta reckon that originally in Rowling's head Hermione was a Ravenclaw and Ron was a Hufflepuff, but then the logistics of them spending time together and going on adventures when they live in different places got too much and she just put them in with Harry instead.
 

Haly

One day I realized that sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
I still don't get why Lupin was telling Harry how James and Sirius were the height of cool and the biggest badasses ever. Like how is it even possible Harry (and Ron/Hermione by association) wasn't even cooler than his dad given that he was legit world-famous.

Probably just nostalgia talking.
 

The Adder

Banned
The entire house system is awful. Hogwarts needs to be taken to task for that shit but the Ministry also happens to be rotten to the core so that won't happen. That school is literally a systematized breeding ground for hate groups and mass murderers. Literally.

Slytherin would be fuckawesome if the fastest way to power wasn't "become racist murdering shitstain.
 

ibyea

Banned
Hufflepuff is for the people who always wonder why they can't catch a break. The people whose grills get manhandled by their neighbours. The people whose lunches are stolen from work. The people whose hobbies are always maligned as "for kids". The people who can't make it work with a prostitute. The people whose sisters know distinctly what it sounds like when they masturbate. The people who can't abide having to apply for jobs in order to get them. The people who tattoo their own genitals because they procrastinated too long.

Hufflepuff: the people who will only ever become wizards at the age of 30.

Duuuude, that is cold.
 

Angry Grimace

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says "does something taste funny to you?"
I seriously hope Rowling regrets making Ginny into some kind of self-insert where she's good at everything and super hot and super pure with eyes only for our true hero.
 
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