So these are two quotes from someone in the TLoU2 thread, which makes me believe it's time to revisit the topic of empathy. When the poster who wrote that got responded to, he got dogpiled. Granted, this attitude and his defense for it is quite poor, but the problem with having dozens of people responding negatively to you at once means that there's little discussion to be had, just because on person gets so overwhelmed. I imagine there are a few posters on here who have the same sentiment, perhaps not as strongly, that don't speak up about it in fear or disinterest of dealing with a dozen people telling them their wrong. So, this is a topic to try and make it more nuanced.
Let me say this much as a preface: If you honestly find yourself unable to relate to another person (or a representation of one) because of something as trivial as their gender, ethnicity, or sexuality, then you are not considering who they are as a whole human being. That's okay. We have a lot of shit that specifically tries to train us to do that in our culture. The only problem is if you are unaware of it and do not try to improve on it.
So...the thing about empathy in relation to gaming (and art in general) are 3 main points.
1. Excepting sociopaths, you can relate to almost anything (and even then, there are exceptions)
This is kind of the basic crux of all fiction. Just consider the success stories we've had. We've related to robots, bug aliens, Animals (this one I don't think needs a film example), all things that are distinctly not human. We've even had one of the most successful relations to inanimate objects in gaming. The only reason it's a meme is because it's real for many.
To this sentiment, it's kind of insulting to try and say that we are unable to empathize or relate to other human beings because they are of a different gender/ethnicity/etc. Yet that is the exact sentiment we get from many people, both in and outside of gaming. One of the most annoying and disgusting examples is Rue, where readers of the Hunger Games were distraught to discover that a little girl who was a sympathetic and tragic figure in the story turns out to have been black.
As disgusting as this response may be, put away the emotional response for the moment and just look at it clinically: Why? Why is it that we have no problem feeling empathy to robots, aliens, and even objects, but other human beings may not?
2. Empathy takes effort and imagination
It does. A lot of people think empathy is a passive activity. That you just sit back, are presented with something, and you either feel, or you do not. And you can do that, but if you do, you run the risk of letting personal bias's control what you feel. So you have to try.
How do you try? Well, games are actually one of the best mediums for getting started on this. Sort of. Technically, books are the ones who have been scientifically proven to expand empathy, because they describe thoughts and give you a strong sense of the worldview of another person. One of the best things, other than going out and talking to other people, is to sit down and read a good book. However, I feel videogames are also very well suited for this task as well. And appropriately enough, a great example is the Last of Us DLC, Left Behind.
I am not a girl, I've never been in love with a black girl, I'm not gay, and it's been a long time since I've been 12 years old. But this is one of the best experiences of LGBT relationships I know of in gaming. But it's not enough to sit back and play through it and not think on it further. The reason this is as rewarding as it is is because this helps inform us of who Ellie is as a person. This relationship she had was central to her life before Joel and Tess, and by the end of the game, it's this relationship that she mentions to try and express her deeper self to him when she asks for the truth. The heart of her arc is how she hates to be alone. And The Last of Us was a complete game before this DLC got released...but to fully appreciate who Ellie is, you have to imagine how it must have been to be her, to be in love with another girl, to lose her, and how that weighs on her for the entire game.
That is when you have fully empathized with Ellie.
3. It's good for you.
This one, I hope, is self explanatory. As much as empathy helps, we have a sense of tribalism that we've developed and hold onto even into this modern age. It's very, very easy to break down a person into some kind of 'other', which you see as alien and unrelatable. You take anything, such as the gender, and you make it the defining characteristic above all others, and making the actual person who they are inaccessible. But in this modern age, othering is more counterproductive and has caused more problems for any given group than it has solved. Empathy, however, lets you truly understand others.
So, if anyone feels some kind of barrier, some kind of incapability to relate when they see a character...any character...I say try. You may not always succeed, but it's an endeavor worth undertaking.