Let me first say the that this thread is about a journey, my family's journey with my son who appears to be on the Autistic Spectrum. He has not been officially diagnosed, as it takes forever to get an appointment for screening. He will be turning 3 at the end of June.
Nothing Physical...
My son was born about 5 days earlier than his expected due date and has never shown any signs of physical issues other than being in the low percentiles for high and weight. No worries there he is just a little guy.
If I would have saw the signs, they would have opened my eyes...
First sign that something wasn't quite right. He doesn't process pain like a normal person. He never cried during his immunizations or other shots. Usually babies freak out when someone stabs them with a needle. I was a dummy. I thought I had a little bad ass on my hands.
Second sign, he never smiled at us. We would smile and play peek-a-boo, nothing. We would tickle him and he would laugh and smile. But he would never return a smile. In fact, he would always have a grimace (grumpy look) on his face. Kids should never just be sitting there looking pissed off. They should return smiles and be able to process emotions. To this day my son does not process emotions like other kids his age and young. And he does not return smiles.
Third sign, he doesn't respond to his name. I'm pretty sure he knows his name. But when you call his name he won't look at you no matter how many times you say his name. However, sometimes he will spontaneously look at you after the first time you say his name. We were fools. We thought he was just off in his own little world, even after the Doctor confirmed there was nothing wrong with his hearing.
Fourth sign, he doesn't look me in the eyes when he responds to me. This is another issue that we ignored, because he would look us in the eyes all other times. We chalked it up to shyness.
Fifth sign, he plays in parallel. This is a tricky one. My son will not engage other kids in play. He will, however, sit next to other kids and play by himself. The only kids he will play with are his brothers. But he will never engage in pretend play with them.
Sixth sign, he doesn't show affection like other children. This is a weird one. My son doesn't give kisses. He allows you to kiss him, if you ask for a kiss. But he only allows kisses sometimes.
I have a whole list that goes on and on. But I'm not going to post all of them.
The Journey Begins...
Just before my son turned 2 we had him evaluated by the State's Infants and Toddlers (InT) program, because he exhibited abnormal social behaviors compared to his older brother and other neighborhood kids his age. InT came out and said he was just a little behind on his social skills, but his communication skills were very low for his age. So the State put him on their speech program. Which was one of the best things that could have happened for him.
We also put him in a 2yr old preschool program. While in the program we would get reports from the school that he was doing fine. Then during the Parent Teacher conference, the teach wrote up a report that made it sound like our kid was autistic and that he should repeat the 2yr old program. We immediately flung ourselves in a state of denial. How could this be right we asked ourselves. Our child does not act like this at home or with the Speech therapist. Even the Speech therapist baulked at the report from the school. Not long after receiving that report we signed him up for the 3yr old program, after my wife and the director agree that he could move forward. However, 2 weeks ago we were told that my son could not move to the 3yr old class the following year and that the 2 yr old class was full. Effectively he was kicked out of Preschool, for the following year.
Now what? Well we started taking the assessment a little more seriously. We started monitoring our child's behavior more closely. With 3 boys (under the age of 5) running around the house that is extremely hard. We started noticing things that didn't seem typical. We started doing some reading and noticed that a lot of his quirky behavior were signs of autism. So my wife and I started talking to people who had autistic kids about how to find out more about it. There are several checklist online, tons of books, and websites that have loads of information.
Doctor, Doctor....
OK, so we did an abundance of self diagnoses. But does that count, some what. We had to find out if our son is on the spectrum or not. Or does he have something completely different. Well the insurance agency was no help when I called them. The first they told me was find someone who could help me. So we contacted 2 facilities that perform the autism tests and both of them told us we wouldn't be seen till late summer or the fall. Also, neither one is in our local area. This wouldn't have been an issue, but the state was stopping Speech for my son because he is not considered to be extremely delayed anymore.
Lucky for us my wife found a person that is opening a private practice that specializes in pediatric development, locally. Our first appointment is on April 15th. This will most likely not be covered by insurance, but I don't care. This is the most important step. If we know the issue is, we can get our son the help he needs.
I will post more info later and hopefully have some videos to share. I hope this will help others.
Nothing Physical...
My son was born about 5 days earlier than his expected due date and has never shown any signs of physical issues other than being in the low percentiles for high and weight. No worries there he is just a little guy.
If I would have saw the signs, they would have opened my eyes...
First sign that something wasn't quite right. He doesn't process pain like a normal person. He never cried during his immunizations or other shots. Usually babies freak out when someone stabs them with a needle. I was a dummy. I thought I had a little bad ass on my hands.
Second sign, he never smiled at us. We would smile and play peek-a-boo, nothing. We would tickle him and he would laugh and smile. But he would never return a smile. In fact, he would always have a grimace (grumpy look) on his face. Kids should never just be sitting there looking pissed off. They should return smiles and be able to process emotions. To this day my son does not process emotions like other kids his age and young. And he does not return smiles.
Third sign, he doesn't respond to his name. I'm pretty sure he knows his name. But when you call his name he won't look at you no matter how many times you say his name. However, sometimes he will spontaneously look at you after the first time you say his name. We were fools. We thought he was just off in his own little world, even after the Doctor confirmed there was nothing wrong with his hearing.
Fourth sign, he doesn't look me in the eyes when he responds to me. This is another issue that we ignored, because he would look us in the eyes all other times. We chalked it up to shyness.
Fifth sign, he plays in parallel. This is a tricky one. My son will not engage other kids in play. He will, however, sit next to other kids and play by himself. The only kids he will play with are his brothers. But he will never engage in pretend play with them.
Sixth sign, he doesn't show affection like other children. This is a weird one. My son doesn't give kisses. He allows you to kiss him, if you ask for a kiss. But he only allows kisses sometimes.
I have a whole list that goes on and on. But I'm not going to post all of them.
The Journey Begins...
Just before my son turned 2 we had him evaluated by the State's Infants and Toddlers (InT) program, because he exhibited abnormal social behaviors compared to his older brother and other neighborhood kids his age. InT came out and said he was just a little behind on his social skills, but his communication skills were very low for his age. So the State put him on their speech program. Which was one of the best things that could have happened for him.
We also put him in a 2yr old preschool program. While in the program we would get reports from the school that he was doing fine. Then during the Parent Teacher conference, the teach wrote up a report that made it sound like our kid was autistic and that he should repeat the 2yr old program. We immediately flung ourselves in a state of denial. How could this be right we asked ourselves. Our child does not act like this at home or with the Speech therapist. Even the Speech therapist baulked at the report from the school. Not long after receiving that report we signed him up for the 3yr old program, after my wife and the director agree that he could move forward. However, 2 weeks ago we were told that my son could not move to the 3yr old class the following year and that the 2 yr old class was full. Effectively he was kicked out of Preschool, for the following year.
Now what? Well we started taking the assessment a little more seriously. We started monitoring our child's behavior more closely. With 3 boys (under the age of 5) running around the house that is extremely hard. We started noticing things that didn't seem typical. We started doing some reading and noticed that a lot of his quirky behavior were signs of autism. So my wife and I started talking to people who had autistic kids about how to find out more about it. There are several checklist online, tons of books, and websites that have loads of information.
Doctor, Doctor....
OK, so we did an abundance of self diagnoses. But does that count, some what. We had to find out if our son is on the spectrum or not. Or does he have something completely different. Well the insurance agency was no help when I called them. The first they told me was find someone who could help me. So we contacted 2 facilities that perform the autism tests and both of them told us we wouldn't be seen till late summer or the fall. Also, neither one is in our local area. This wouldn't have been an issue, but the state was stopping Speech for my son because he is not considered to be extremely delayed anymore.
Lucky for us my wife found a person that is opening a private practice that specializes in pediatric development, locally. Our first appointment is on April 15th. This will most likely not be covered by insurance, but I don't care. This is the most important step. If we know the issue is, we can get our son the help he needs.
I will post more info later and hopefully have some videos to share. I hope this will help others.
