Bigrx1
Banned
I've never posted a thread like this here and I'm not sure how this will go, but I just wanted to put a voice to an inner frustration/anger that has been building inside of me for the last few years and see what other people had to say. I feel if I were to post this on a lot of other social media type places I would just be called transphobic or attacked relentlessly - maybe that will happen here too I don't know. So let me start with this: I don't care if you identify as gay, straight, cis, trans, both, whatever, it doesn't bother me and I don't have a problem with it. You doing you is your choice and I"m not even going to judge it or think it's stupid or wrong, I'm not scared of it and I don't think it's wrong either. I have ZERO problem with how you identify for YOURSELF.
However, when a person, or other people, tell me I have to call someone "we" or "they" it makes ME uncomfortable. I feel like I'm being forced to play along with something that doesn't even match a general reality - the fact that it's a single person standing there. There is ONE of you, but I'm being asked to in essence lie and refer to you as multiple people. Why? Why does this person even need that to feel comfortable anyway? It comes across to me as this very pressuring thing to do to others, at least it is to me, in order to accommodate this one person that needs special accommodation. Am I also supposed to call people with multiple personality disorder "they" and "we"? What about an older person who also identifies as being young at heart? Old and young guy in one body so "we"? What about businessman who is a rapper on the side? 2 different people in one body? "they, we"?
And it's not the same as someone trans who switches to the other gender because if it's a man who switches to a woman, then calling that person her or she mentally fits in the realm of reality since it is indeed one person - albeit that one person has changed.
So, it makes me uncomfortable and I feel pressured when you (singular person) wants me to call you "they" or "we". Now what? Why does your comfort level have higher priority than mine and I have to cater to you lest I be seen as a monster. It makes me angry. And I'm sure people can find something I said here to call me a piece of shit, or be pedantic about some word choice I used and do the same, but there it is. I said it.
However, when a person, or other people, tell me I have to call someone "we" or "they" it makes ME uncomfortable. I feel like I'm being forced to play along with something that doesn't even match a general reality - the fact that it's a single person standing there. There is ONE of you, but I'm being asked to in essence lie and refer to you as multiple people. Why? Why does this person even need that to feel comfortable anyway? It comes across to me as this very pressuring thing to do to others, at least it is to me, in order to accommodate this one person that needs special accommodation. Am I also supposed to call people with multiple personality disorder "they" and "we"? What about an older person who also identifies as being young at heart? Old and young guy in one body so "we"? What about businessman who is a rapper on the side? 2 different people in one body? "they, we"?
And it's not the same as someone trans who switches to the other gender because if it's a man who switches to a woman, then calling that person her or she mentally fits in the realm of reality since it is indeed one person - albeit that one person has changed.
So, it makes me uncomfortable and I feel pressured when you (singular person) wants me to call you "they" or "we". Now what? Why does your comfort level have higher priority than mine and I have to cater to you lest I be seen as a monster. It makes me angry. And I'm sure people can find something I said here to call me a piece of shit, or be pedantic about some word choice I used and do the same, but there it is. I said it.