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Nick Robinson (Polygon) answers to sexual harassment allegations, leaves Polygon

Lmfao, learn what racism is before running in here trying to make it about you...the typical American white male. And the classic, "replace white with black and—" just stop. That example has never, and will never work. Enjoy your exit.

On topic, I'm just glad that the story seems to conclude with some type of justice. Even if his apology was dodgy as hell, his 'fame' is over.

There are multiple definitions of racism. Of which "prejudice + power", or simply "prejudice directed at someone based on race" are both valid. The issue is that people like to come in using one definition or the other, without specifying and then use it to beat the other side over the head with.

In the USA the prejudice + power definition is most often used when discussing the issues of race in America, as it refers to the type of racism that is the primary problem here. It is of course offensive when white people conflate black on white racism as the same thing as prejudice + power racism.

I think people just need to be honest with what definition they are using and the context of the discussion. Purposefully being vague in order to bait a response, and then bash them with it is not helpful in my opinion.
 

SimonM7

Member
I still won't visit your shitty site, Polygon. Any company that would have a man like this hired does not deserve my clicks.

Witness the alchemy like power of taking anything and making it about yourself and your totally irrelevant, vaguely adjacent - and that's being generous - agenda.
 
That is exactly how I read his apology before everyone went all Zapruder film on it. He said he messed up, what he did was wrong but he just didn't realize it in the moment and he's working on bettering himself. All of that is there.

You don't "accidentally" harass a whole bunch of women and pressure them to stay silent and not realize what you're doing is wrong, lol. I don't understand how it can not occur to some people that someone like that can write an "apology" like this purely as a means of self-preservation.
 

Spman2099

Member
Lmfao, learn what racism is before running in here trying to make it about you...the typical American white male. And the classic, "replace white with black and—" just stop. That example has never, and will never work. Enjoy your exit.

Yikes.

This thread is getting crazier by the second...
 
People don't like Gaf because the moderation doesn't allow you to be openly shitty and post obviously regressive dumb views. It's not that strange. If you wanna say dumb racist, sexist, bigoted views you're just gonna get ban quick. And people (ie irrelevant) don't like that the biggest gaming forum on the planet wont let them be openly garbage.

Sucks for them, they can go back to reddit lmao.

I just wanna say this is exactly why I love GAF. Even though I got banned earlier this year for a reason that was not justified IMO, the mods do such a great job here keeping the forum as non-toxic as possible. It's pretty amazing compared to the cesspool of shit that is the majority of the internet.
 
I still won't visit your shitty site, Polygon. Any company that would have a man like this hired does not deserve my clicks.

No company can ever be that scrupulous. It was only a couple months ago an ex-Gaf mod was reported for child porn offences, is that reason enough for you to stop visiting Gaf? People are responsible for their actions, not their employers.
 

Trup1aya

Member
You don't "accidentally" harass a whole bunch of women and pressure them to stay silent and not realize what you're doing is wrong, lol. I don't understand how it can not occur to some people that someone like that can write an "apology" like this purely as a means of self-preservation.

I think you'd be surprised how often ignorance and immaturity breeds sexual harassment rather than pure malice.

I once had to let go of an employee for sexual harassment. During the interviews it became clear that she thought her behavior was not only welcome but necessary in order to gain the approval of her mostly male co-workers.

It didn't help that sometimes her advances were accepted - which acted as positive reinforcement. It even never dawned on her that many only accepted because they felt pressured.

I think in many of these sexual harassment cases the perpetrator actually doesnt perceive what they are doing is wrong or manipulative - even when they are putting in an effort you keep it secret.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
I'd be really interested to see someone who has criticized his apology craft an apology that WOULD be acceptable to the people in this thread given his transgressions.

Because it sure feels like people are saying that his actions were so bad that he can't apologize for them and deserves no chance at redemption in their eyes.
.



"I'm sorry, to everyone I've hurt, and scared, and made to feel gross because of the harassment I put them through.

I exploited my position and used it to prey for sex, I had no thoughts regarding my victim's feelings only my own. Reading through my messages now and I can see how inappropriate they were, how disgusting my behaviour was, I wasn't thinking with my head, or I knew but I didn't care.

This has been a huge reality check. I can assure you I'm going to do all I can to educate myself out of this behaviour pattern.

I cannot stress how sorry I am to the victims of my actions. I will do my best to make right, I don't expect forgiveness, but I would ask you give me a chance to prove I can change. Of course, I don't expect even that and I have no right to.

Please continue to hit me with the reality here, I have a lot of work to do and I'm reading as much of your messages as I can.

I want to change, and I'm going to try."

Something like that and I would have believed it.

The only reason you don't write an apology like the above is you don't fucking mean it.
 
Anyway as a side note. Dude isn't gonna incriminate himself by admitting to anything so while the apology is bullshit the legal system really ties your hands there. Even if he was sorry (he isn't) he literally only hurts himself by acknowledging any true wrong doing or damage.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
Anyway as a side note. Dude isn't gonna incriminate himself by admitting to anything so while the apology is bullshit the legal system really ties your hands there. Even if he was sorry (he isn't) he literally only hurts himself by acknowledging any true wrong doing or damage.

If he really meant it he wouldn't care about incriminating himself. He whould admit what he did and face the consequences.
 
"I'm sorry, to everyone I've hurt, and scared, and made to feel gross because of the harassment I put them through.

I exploited my position and used it to prey for sex, I had no thoughts regarding my victim's feelings only my own. Reading through my messages now and I can see how inappropriate they were, how disgusting my behaviour was, I wasn't thinking with my head, or I knew but I didn't care.

This has been a huge reality check. I can assure you I'm going to do all I can to educate myself out of this behaviour pattern.

I cannot stress how sorry I am to the victims of my actions. I will do my best to make right, I don't expect forgiveness, but I would ask you give me a chance to prove I can change. Of course, I don't expect even that and I have no right to.

Please continue to hit me with the reality here, I have a lot of work to do and I'm reading as much of your messages as I can.

I want to change, and I'm going to try."

Something like that and I would have believed it.

The only reason you don't write an apology like the above is you don't fucking mean it.
Another thing that a lot of sexual health professionals would advocate for is offering, but not forcing, a private or mediated conversation with himself and the survivors, or the survivors and a sexual health professional given consent to share the thoughts to Nick, to: listen to their experiences, hear about the distress he caused them, and hear from the survivors what next steps they would like him to take if he's serious about improving before they would ever consider him serious about his apology and wanting to be better. All the while making it clear that he understands it's not their job to educate him and he shouldn't expect or feel deserving of those explanations.

Edit: It's been brought to my attention that labeling the people who Nick Robinson has been accused of harassing as 'survivors' may be unfair to their experience or how they would label themselves. I apologize for that. I hope the message about offering/asking for input and guidance from sexual health professionals and not expecting/feeling entitled to, but offering mediated conversations to educate himself stands, though.
 
If he really meant it he wouldn't care about incriminating himself. He whould admit what he did and face the consequences.

Naw, you can feel something but still want to best protect yourself from the the fallout. Part of the reason we have lawyers and proceedings is so you don't get utterly or unfairly fucked for a wrong doing simply because you accept responsibility.

The dude is an asshole but once shit has reached this point I am not going to be like "assume all wrath from everyone because it's only fair". That's naive. I frankly don't think people who want that are on a great moral plane either.

I don't expect some low level drug dealer to come out an be like "I did it, slap me with 10 years. Consequences!!!" Do you think that's reasonable?
 
The majority of white people who just ignored the post instead of crying about it like you are would disagree.

Ask the majority first before talking for them. And the "white people...." is often the same shit every other kind of racism is, period.

That's about as good apology as you can imagine.

Its a good start. I'd like to see him get some education on what he did, and become active in speaking about it and making sure others don't have to deal with what he put those people through.

He was a well known personality and still is, so now he can use his platform to promote the positive change he's seeking himself, and help others do the same.

Edit: I am a bit concerned about how much he leans in on his 'position', I'm not sure he completely understands that this is wrong regardless of whether you're a prominent games journalist or not.

He did probably not commit a crime and of course it makes a difference what position he is in. The 18 year old he hit on played along, she probably wouldn't have played along if he wasn't a star like she called it. She would have blocked him and called it a day, but she didn't.

He apologizes, you can't await more from him after loosing his job. If you like his apology or not, that's your decision and not important to the case.

so now he can use his platform to promote the positive change he's seeking himself, and help others do the same.

He could also become Jesus. I can't even. Hopefully he will stop embarrassing himself and the girls he hit on in a very stupid way.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
Naw, you can feel something but still want to best protect yourself from the the fallout. Part of the reason we have lawyers and proceedings is so you don't get utterly or unfairly fucked for a wrong doing simply because you accept responsibility. The dude is an asshole but once shit has reached this point I am not going to be like "assume all wrath from everyone because it's only fair". That's naive.

Dude, he didn't murder someone. Pretty sure he was never going to get serious punishment from the law here.

Unless I've missed something or don't understand the laws surrounding sexual harassment? They seem to be pretty fucking lax though, the shit people seem to get away with online all the time...
 
Another thing that a lot of sexual health professionals would advocate for is offering, but not forcing, a private or mediated conversation with himself and the survivors, or the survivors and a sexual health professional given consent to share the thoughts to Nick, to: listen to their experiences, hear about the distress he caused them, and hear from the survivors what next steps they would like him to take if he's serious about improving before they would ever consider him serious about his apology and wanting to be better. All the while making it clear that he understands it's not their job to educate him and he shouldn't expect or feel deserving of those explanations.

Isn't calling his victims "survivors" a little offensive to survivors of more serious and violent sexual assaults? Also doesn't referring to them as survivors further victimize them as if this person is permanently tarnished and needs help? Don't you think some women are capable of brushing him off as a creep without being traumatized?

I think we are verging on portraying women as fragile, and if someone asks them to "send nudes" they get PTSD. What he did was wrong, but I don't want to force labels on someone like that just to make him look worse.
 

L Thammy

Member
I'd be really interested to see someone who has criticized his apology craft an apology that WOULD be acceptable to the people in this thread given his transgressions.

Because it sure feels like people are saying that his actions were so bad that he can't apologize for them and deserves no chance at redemption in their eyes.
.

I'm not the one he has to seek forgiveness from, but I think the main missing thing is this:

Malicious intent.

Robinson told women to keep silent. That means that he knows what he does is wrong and has continued to do it anyway. Nowhere in that apology does he acknowledge this. He frames it as a mistake, poor judgment, well-intentioned things that he didn't fully think out or were received differently than he hoped. That's what the apology is for, and that's not what he did.

If he doesn't admit that he did what he did knowingly and willingly, is it any surprise that people don't buy his apology?

With the lack of sex education in this country, and the current lack of evidence that he did something far worse, how are we certain that he isn't being genuine? It's just speculation that he's nefarious, and not simply some dopey horndog who let his knob do his thinking.

That's what makes a lot of perpetrators sexual harassment/assault so aggravating. Nobody has ever explicitly taught them that doing things which are harmful/traumatic for the sake of their own pleasure is wrong. It's why you get thousands of incidents in college dorms where it seems like the predator has zero understanding of consent and basic sexual decency.

We know that Robinson was nefarious and not some simple dopey horndog. Again, he was telling women to keep silent. This isn't a matter of him not knowing any better. If he didn't know what he did was wrong, if he simply didn't understand consent, he would have no reason to shut anyone up.
 
Isn't calling his victims "survivors" a little offensive to survivors of more serious and violent sexual assaults? Also doesn't referring to them as survivors further victimize them as if this person is permanently tarnished and needs help? Don't you think some women are capable of brushing him off as a creep without being traumatized?

I think we are verging on portraying women as fragile, and if someone asks them to "send nudes" they get PTSD. What he did was wrong, but I don't want to force labels on someone like that just to make him look worse.
You could very well be right. I've done courses on survivor-first approaches to harassment and bystander training and they are very careful to use the word survivor in more contexts than we might normally expect, but it's true that I am not privy to the details of what happened and shouldn't be labeling their experiences. So thanks for pointing that out.
 
Dude, he didn't murder someone. Pretty sure he was never going to get serious punishment from the law here.

You think that was crafted without a lawyers input? Is this your first rodeo? Even if dude is just framing himself up for a civil suit he still is not going to publish material that make him vulnerable. It's not a hard thing to grasp. Again, he isn't sorry but even if he was he aint gon come out and put that target on himself. I don't feel like that's controversial.

Unless I've missed something or don't understand the laws surrounding sexual harassment? They seem to be pretty fucking lax though, the shit people seem to get away with online all the time...

That has nothing to do with what I said. I said dude can't put materials out there that are gonna hurt him. I didn't say he's going to jail.

I also said you can be sorry and still not wanna open yourself up to getting dumped on. Are those concepts really that controversial? (Again, he isn't sorry so it's w/e anyway)
 

Zakalwe

Banned
You think that was crafted without a lawyers input? Is this your first rodeo? Even if dude is just framing himself up for a civil suit he still is not going to publish material that make him vulnerable. It's not a hard thing to grasp. Again, he isn't sorry but even if he was he aint gon come out and put that target on himself. I don't feel like that's controversial.

I grasp it. I just think someone who was truly looking to make amends would take the punishment.

Especially as he very likely wouldn't receive any kind of punishment from the law here.

If he'd done something that broke the law I'd maybe see your point.

That has nothing to do with what I said. I said dude can't put materials out there that are gonna hurt him. I didn't say he's going to jail.

I also said you can be sorry and still not wanna open yourself up to getting dumped on. Are those concepts really that controversial? (Again, he isn't sorry so it's w/e anyway)

If all an admission will open you up to is "getting dumped on" then yes, I do expect a full confession from someone who claims to be genuine.
 

Trup1aya

Member
If he really meant it he wouldn't care about incriminating himself. He whould admit what he did and face the consequences.

Of course a person would care about incriminating himself... usually this consequences are going to impact more than just the perpetrator.

He's already lost his employment. He'd probably like to avoid losing more than that... especially if others depend on him financially.

Its naive to suggest that everyone who legitimately rebukes their behavior would simultaneously be willing to accept every single possible consequence.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
Of course a person would care about incriminating himself... usually this consequences are going to impact more than just the perpetrator.

He's already lost his employment. He'd probably like to avoid losing more than that... especially if others depend on him financially.

Its naive to suggest that everyone who legitimately rebukes their behavior would simultaneously be willing to accept every single possible consequence.

It would be naive if there were actual laws broken.

The irony is if he'd gone full admission and owned his actions, people would proably be far, far more accepting/forgiving.
 
I grasp it. I just think someone who was truly looking to make amends would take the punishment.

Lol, I'm sorry but no. Making amends isn't always about accepting all consequences under the sun because you're sorry. This is naive.

Especially as he very likely wouldn't receive any kind of punishment from the law here.

Law isn't just criminal. Thereare civil components to it as well. If he fully put forth everything that has come to light you are damn well sure there is going to be a civil suit.

If he'd done something that broke the law I'd maybe see your point.

My point was about civil suits as well so I dunno what you are talking about. Are you under the impression that getting sued is not a serious process with serious implications?


If all an admission will open you up to is "getting dumped on" then yes, I do expect a full confession from someone who claims to be genuine.

This is where I reaffirm that your idea of consequences are naive. Now personally I hope the dude gets crushed should it all come to light but I don't fault someone for wanting to protect themselves. That's just natural. What if the dude has a family he supports, is he suppose to be like "well I did wrong so take everything"? I mean come on. Being genuine is not the same thing as being foolish.
 

Eppy Thatcher

God's had his chance.
You think that was crafted without a lawyers input? Is this your first rodeo? Even if dude is just framing himself up for a civil suit he still is not going to publish material that make him vulnerable. It's not a hard thing to grasp. Again, he isn't sorry but even if he was he aint gon come out and put that target on himself. I don't feel like that's controversial.



That has nothing to do with what I said. I said dude can't put materials out there that are gonna hurt him. I didn't say he's going to jail.

I also said you can be sorry and still not wanna open yourself up to getting dumped on. Are those concepts really that controversial? (Again, he isn't sorry so it's w/e anyway)

Seems like someone undestands how the real world works in this dumpster fire of a thread.

You apologize publicly, with the help of your company and their lawyers, pull away from twitter or what the fuck ever and then mitigate any damage to your career that you can while you pivot towards something else.

If dude ever wants to work in a high profile industry again he can't go on about how "Disgusting and evil and cruel and fucked up all my sexual advances were. I asked a girl to piss on a doll and then send me the doll for christs sakes! I suggested she put her nudes in the resume!!! Fuck me i'm awful!"

People want the dude to walk the street like a monk on fire... hate him if you want forever that's fuckin fine but he was never gonna come out and put himself on huge blast for all ya'll sakes or the girls he was hitting up. He got called out and sunk back and apologized as quickly and cleanly as he could while he gathers his fan base/supporters to him in a smaller fashion. The patreon emails will go out shortly i'm sure...
 

Mattenth

Member
I still won't visit your shitty site, Polygon. Any company that would have a man like this hired does not deserve my clicks.

So you're saying that the penalty for a bad hiring decision is a permanent, lifelong boycott?

Makes sense. You don't give Apple or Google or Uber or Microsoft or Activision or Blizzard or EA your money either, right? I mean, all of them have hired sexist pigs in the past. I'm sure they'll do it again in the future. We can't give them our money. We just can't support that kind of behavior.

Mindsets like this is why the US struggles with reintegrating felons. You should try practicing forgiveness.

Edit: Is it just me, or is it weird that this thread is still going? This apology wasn't addressed to neogaf (nor should it have been). Is there something that really warrants further discussion?
 

Zakalwe

Banned
Lol, I'm sorry but no. Making amends isn't always about accepting all consequences under the sun because you're sorry. This is naive.

Law isn't just criminal. Thereare civil components to it as well. If he fully put forth everything that has come to light you are damn well sure there is going to be a civil suit.

My point was about civil suits as well so I dunno what you are talking about. Are you under the impression that getting sued is not a serious process with serious implications?

This is where I reaffirm that your idea of consequences are naive. Now personally I hope the dude gets crushed should it all come to light but I don't fault someone for wanting to protect themselves. That's just natural. What if the dude has a family he supports, is he suppose to be like "well I did wrong so take everything"? I mean come on. Being genuine is not the same thing as being foolish.

Sorry mate, but I still think if he really cared he'd risk all of that and admit it.

Plus the blowback from his current apology is probably doing much more harm than a genuine one that owned his actions would.

As I said before, I honestly think if he came out and admitted it all and owned it, he'd be having an easier ride.

Seems like someone undestands how the real world works in this dumpster fire of a thread.

You apologize publicly, with the help of your company and their lawyers, pull away from twitter or what the fuck ever and then mitigate any damage to your career that you can while you pivot towards something else.

If dude ever wants to work in a high profile industry again he can't go on about how "Disgusting and evil and cruel and fucked up all my sexual advances were. I asked a girl to piss on a doll and then send me the doll for christs sakes! I suggested she put her nudes in the resume!!! Fuck me i'm awful!"

People want the dude to walk the street like a monk on fire... hate him if you want forever that's fuckin fine but he was never gonna come out and put himself on huge blast for all ya'll sakes or the girls he was hitting up. He got called out and sunk back and apologized as quickly and cleanly as he could while he gathers his fan base/supporters to him in a smaller fashion. The patreon emails will go out shortly i'm sure...

People have come back from far, far worse than what this guy did after taking ownership of their actions.

He's a coward to not.

The entire public sphere surrounding the gaming industry knows him for this now, and they also now think he's been disingenuous with his apology. Had he appeased these people with a genuine ownership of his actions, he'd likely have a much better chance at regaining their trust and support in future.
 

Trup1aya

Member
It would be naive if there were actual laws broken.

The irony is if he'd gone full admission and owned his actions, people would proably be far, far more accepting/forgiving.

Sexual harassment IS against the law. He's definately a prime target for civil suits.

His desire for People's acceptance is probably a secondary priority compared to being able to avoid bankruptcy and pay his mortgage.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
Sexual harassment IS against the law. He's definately a prime target for civil suits.

His desire for People's acceptance is probably a secondary priority compared to being able to avoid bankruptcy and pay his mortgage.

He's lost his job and probably any hope of gaining a well paid job in the industry in the future. I mean, if people were going to file a case surely they'd be more inclined to do it now they think his apology is deflecting his actions?

If he'd meant it, the risk would have been worth it imo.
 

Trup1aya

Member
He's lost his job and probably any hope of gaining a well paid job in the industry in the future. I mean, if people were going to file a case surely they'd be more inclined to do it now they think his apology is deflecting his actions?

If he'd meant it, the risk would have been worth it imo.

I'm sorry man you are being extremely naive.

Once the admission of guilt comes, lawyers hounding every female he ever contacted on social media will follow... they'd be telling them how much $ they could potentially get from him and his former employers.

People who weren't even considering suing him or polygon would suddenly be in the mix. Because they'd have all the evidence they need.
 
Sorry mate, but I still think if he really cared he'd risk all of that and admit it.

You sound like someone who has never done something wrong.

Plus the blowback from his current apology is probably doing much more harm than a genuine one that owned his actions would.

As I said before, I honestly think if he came out and admitted it all and owned it, he'd be having an easier ride.

It's fresh in everyone's mind is all, you're wrong. He isn't going to work in gaming in any major capacity regardless. Right now he is trying to smooth his pivot while protecting assets and you don't smooth it out by going full blown "Look at all my flaws, look at all my bullshit"

Like I said early, this stuff is why I just think these people should shut the fuck up and say nothing. Better than throwing out these none sense not apoligies. He's a dick, he aint sorry, just disappear with some level of pride.
 
Of course a person would care about incriminating himself... usually this consequences are going to impact more than just the perpetrator.

He's already lost his employment. He'd probably like to avoid losing more than that... especially if others depend on him financially.

Its naive to suggest that everyone who legitimately rebukes their behavior would simultaneously be willing to accept every single possible consequence.

When your behavior has been unconscionable and also actionable, you get to choose between owning up and opening yourself to the consequences of your actions or getting defensive and deflecting.

If he wants to be defensive, that's a choice he gets to make, but to put out a duplicitous "apology" like this is just another manipulation aimed at getting him back onto people's good sides without genuinely owning up to his behavior and showing any genuine remorse.

He gets to pick one or the other. He's desperately trying to have both.
 

daemissary

Member
I'm not the one he has to seek forgiveness from, but I think the main missing thing is this:

Malicious intent.

Robinson told women to keep silent. That means that he knows what he does is wrong and has continued to do it anyway. Nowhere in that apology does he acknowledge this. He frames it as a mistake, poor judgment, well-intentioned things that he didn't fully think out or were received differently than he hoped. That's what the apology is for, and that's not what he did.

If he doesn't admit that he did what he did knowingly and willingly, is it any surprise that people don't buy his apology?



We know that Robinson was nefarious and not some simple dopey horndog. Again, he was telling women to keep silent. This isn't a matter of him not knowing any better. If he didn't know what he did was wrong, if he simply didn't understand consent, he would have no reason to shut anyone up.

We don't "know" he was being nefarious. There's a huge difference between "I know I'm harassing you so keep your mouth shut or else" and "Hey, please don't tell anyone I'm doing this because I don't want my sex life in the public eye."

I don't think he was specifically doing either one of those things...I think the answer is somewhere in the middle. Life isn't black and white.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
You sound like someone who has never done something wrong.

It's fresh in everyone's mind is all, you're wrong. He isn't going to work in gaming in any major capacity regardless. Right now he is trying to smooth his pivot while protecting assets and you don't smooth it out by going full blown "Look at all my flaws, look at all my bullshit"

Like I said early, this stuff is why I just think these people should shut the fuck up and say nothing. Better than throwing out these none sense not apoligies. He's a dick, he aint sorry, just disappear with some level of pride.

And I fully believe a person can come back from pretty much anything but the vilest of crimes if they have the intent to make good.

It's been done before, it will be done again.

I'm sorry man you are being extremely naive.

Once the admission of guilt comes, lawyers hounding every female he ever contacted on social media will follow...

People who weren't even considering suing him or polygon would suddenly be in the mix. Because they'd have all the evidence they need.

While that may be the case, it also may not.

What's 100% certain is this: his shit apology has caused an uproar and, unless he makes a lot of positive action in the future, he likely has no future in this industry whereas full ownership and a steady run of good actions that proved his commitment could have gone a long way to him being accepted back.
 

Trup1aya

Member
When your behavior has been unconscionable and also actionable, you get to choose between owning up and opening yourself to the consequences of your actions or getting defensive and deflecting.

If he wants to be defensive, that's a choice he gets to make, but to put out a duplicitous "apology" like this is just another manipulation aimed at getting him back onto people's good sides without genuinely owning up to his behavior and showing any genuine remorse.

He gets to pick one or the other. He's desperately trying to have both.

Sure it is... I'm not arguing out isn't. But it the real world, when people have bills to pay financial harikari is a naive thing to expect from someone susceptible to civil suits.

This isn't a Disney movie.
 
Nick leaned too heavily on the idea that he was embarrassed. It ended up making me feel like he was positioning himself as a victim the way he brought it up multiple times. What about the people caught up in this. They're probably pretty embarrassed too.

Other than that it felt pretty earnest. It has never been a better time to fly solo with all the Patreon crap. So hopefully he'll be able to find a way to pay rent etc and victims can move on.

Until next time game industry.
 
This really bothers me, as a father to a daughter. The courage it must take to step forward is nuts. For fear of others judging you, victim blaming you and feeling you're overreacting.

It must be so hard for woman in gaming industry. I never think about it, being a man. I know this issue isn't exclusive to the gaming industry. It just sucks the my #1 hobby (and shaping up to be my daughter's too) is very much still so backwards for women and girls. I fear the day my daughter wants to voice chat online and guys hear she's a girl. That bad behavior is still going on.
 
And I fully believe a person can come back from pretty much anything but the vilest of crimes if they have the intent to make good.

It's been done before, it will be done again.

Nothing says he isn't coming back from this. We wont know for some time.

While that may be the case, it also may not.

What's 100% certain is this: his shit apology has caused an uproar and, unless he makes a lot of positive action in the future, he likely has no future in this industry whereas full ownership and a steady run of good actions that proved his commitment could have gone a long way to him being accepted back.

This apology hasn't damaged anything lol. It is one of a bunch of things he needs to do to pivot but if you think this sealed it for him lol. Again, there is a level of naive at play here. This is covering tracks, that's all.


Dude's just a huge douchebag though. We'll have to see what happens. I find in these case my personal "watch them burn" philosophy has to be kept in check by "be reasonable about how they have to play this"
 

Zakalwe

Banned
Sure it is... I'm not arguing out isn't. But it the real world, when people have bills to pay financial harikari is a naive thing to expect from someone susceptible to civil suits.

This isn't a Disney movie.


No, but he's already lost his job and I'd imagine he was pretty committed to it to get to where he got to. That's a whole lot of time to throw away.

Also many of the peripheral jobs that surround the industry are going to be aware of this due to the nature of social media, so it's not like he can just shift over into something else like this using contacts he knows.

He's going to have to start over again regardless, and chances are his name will ring out regardless of what he's admitted to.

Dude was a creep, he harassed people, then he deflected it with an apology that has probably made his victims feel even worse.

He's going to have a horrible time regardless.

I mean, all of this is pointless to talk about anyway because he clearly /didn't/ mean it which is why the apology is the way it is.

Nothing says he isn't coming back from this. We wont know for some time.



This apology hasn't damaged anything lol. It is one of a bunch of things he needs to do to pivot but if you think this sealed it for him lol. Again, there is a level of naive at play here. This is covering tracks, that's all.

You're now the one being naive if you think his apology hasn't cause damage. The responses are real, and the industry is small. It's not going to forget this easily.
 

BTA

Member
You could very well be right. I've done courses on survivor-first approaches to harassment and bystander training and they are very careful to use the word survivor in more contexts than we might normally expect, but it's true that I am not privy to the details of what happened and shouldn't be labeling their experiences. So thanks for pointing that out.

I would use "survivor" by default when talking about sexual assault (similarly I've been involved in training/presentations for that and bystander stuff, etc.), but I've been opting for "victim" here because that's what most people who are talking about this and are close to the, uh, victims seem to be using.

Beyond that I'd say I disagree with some of Temeculan's logic/wording but agree "survivor" might have traumatic connotations that don't match some/most of what's happened.

I feel like we're talking out of our asses about something that probably has a decent consensus already reached elsewhere by people that know better.
 

Trup1aya

Member
And I fully believe a person can come back from pretty much anything but the vilest of crimes if they have the intent to make good.

It's been done before, it will be done again.



While that may be the case, it also may not.

What's 100% certain is this: his shit apology has caused an uproar and, unless he makes a lot of positive action in the future, he likely has no future in this industry whereas full ownership and a steady run of good actions that proved his commitment could have gone a long way to him being accepted back.

No his sexual harassment has caused an uproar. There is no apology that would ever see him hirable in this industry (at least not by a reputable company). And even if this wasn't the case, returning to the industry wouldn't undo the realities of being held financially liable after admitting guilt.

There is nothing new about this situation. The lawyers wrote this apology in this manner because of experience.

If your options are "be broke, change jobs, yet be forgiven by previous industry" or "keep your savings, change jobs, not be forgiven" - even people that are remorseful will choose the latter... that's just the way it is .
 

M.J. Doja

Banned
Lots of defense for this fella in this thread. All of the false equivalence, and that good ol' whataboutism.

I understand many dudes are mostly concerned with his right against self incrimination, but not too concerned with his actions or his apology.

Men's rights are being infringed upon, gentlemen!
 

Zakalwe

Banned
No his sexual harassment has caused an uproar.

Sorry dude, but there are links ITT showing the reaction to his apology. The reactions are real.

There is no apology that would ever see him hirable in this industry (at least not by a reputable company l. And even if this wasn't the case, returning to the industry wouldn't undo the realities of being held financially liable after admitting guilt.

There is nothing new about this situation. The lawyers wrote this apology in this manner because of experience.

I disagree. People have come back from worse.

It doesn't matter if this is the way its done because of least potential blowback. With honest intention and a lot of hard work, I'm pretty sure he could have carved himself a spot again even if it was via crowd funding or something.
 
You're now the one being naive if you think his apology hasn't cause damage. The responses are real, and the industry is small. It's not going to forget this easily.

You haven't watched how these unfold have you? You really don't sound like you understand what's going on here. Again, you think he released that without legal council?

Lots of defense for this fella in this thread. All of the false equivalence, and that good ol' whataboutism.

I understand many dudes are mostly concerned with his right against self incrimination, but not too concerned with his actions or his apology.

Men's rights are being infringed upon, gentlemen!

I want the dude to get buried personally. That said, this is how these things unfold. I don't think the discussion in the last 2 pages can actually be reduced to your post if you're actually arguing in good faith.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
You haven't watched how these unfold have you? You really don't sound like you understand what's going on here. Again, you think he released that without legal council?

Please drop the mansplainy tone. I understand this is the done thing to mitigate damage, but I also strongly believe if he'd owned it and been genuine he could have, after a lot of hard work, carved himself a spot out in the industry again.

I disagree with you. Maybe we should leave it here. :)
 
Sure it is... I'm not arguing out isn't. But it the real world, when people have bills to pay financial harikari is a naive thing to expect from someone susceptible to civil suits.

This isn't a Disney movie.

It's understandable, but it doesn't mean that people, like say us here on GAF, shouldn't point out that his statement is self-serving bullshit. He doesn't get brownie points for a manipulative bullshit non-apology.

He gets to make that decision to dissemble and deflect, and people get to look at his behavior and say that his decision to not own up to what he's done is bad and shameful.
 

Zakalwe

Banned
It's understandable, but it doesn't mean that people, like say us here on GAF, shouldn't point out that his statement is self-serving bullshit. He doesn't get brownie points for a manipulative bullshit non-apology.

He gets to make that decision to dissemble and deflect, and people get to look at his behavior and say that his decision to not own up to what he's done is bad and shameful.

Exactly. Thank you.
 

FinalAres

Member
That seemed like a good apology for someone who thinks what he did was really wrong, but doesn't really believe it was incredibly wrong. If that makes sense.
 
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