-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
So, how can we fix dating for men?
- Thread starter West Texas CEO
- Start date
Bridges
Member
The #1 thing is you need to work on yourself. Identify shortcomings in your life and address them. Work on your social skills, get a quality job. Have a car. Don't live with your parents. Take care of your health/hygiene. Foster passions and hobbies that are interesting to the opposite sex (more than just videogames and nerd shit). Dress like an adult.
Friendzoning sucks but there is a silver lining. Instead of getting mad or simping for eternity, just be friends with a woman. You'll learn a lot about how to treat women and be appealing to them by having a platonic friendship. And if she's really cool, she might even help you find a date. The practice and comfortability that comes from female companionship will do a lot of good when it comes time to date.
No woman wants to be with a man who can't hold a conversation, or worse, acts like every conversation with a woman is the first they've ever had.
Friendzoning sucks but there is a silver lining. Instead of getting mad or simping for eternity, just be friends with a woman. You'll learn a lot about how to treat women and be appealing to them by having a platonic friendship. And if she's really cool, she might even help you find a date. The practice and comfortability that comes from female companionship will do a lot of good when it comes time to date.
No woman wants to be with a man who can't hold a conversation, or worse, acts like every conversation with a woman is the first they've ever had.
nush
Member
I read it as specifically "Making friends" to get her in bed eventually. It's disingenuous. It's the "Nice guy" thinking of putting in enough kindness coins until she pays out in sex.
poodaddy
Member
Yeah that would be disingenuous. Suppose I just interpreted it in a manner to give him the benefit of the doubt, as I think that poster is a pretty decent guy from what I can tell, though I get what you're saying.
Edit: I'll fully admit he didn't put his best foot forward here talking about liking to specifically engage in romantic relationships with taken women, that's scumbag shit for sure lol.
Just saying that in other threads he's come off like a semi decent human being at times, so I was going off that. I Could be way off though.
Last edited:
Nobody_Important
“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
I know that I always go to online video game forums when I want accurate and educated opinions on women and the modern dating scene.
Last edited:
I'd add to this, if you have female friends, they can give you advice on things you actually do need to improve.
The Cockatrice
Member
You didnt misinterpret and you can quote me next time.
nush
just hates women so he twisted my words when in fact he knows very well what I meant. You can read my other posts as well on the matter. I never said you have to fake the nice guy to get in bed. Also notice how he never upvotes any post related to actual genuine advice, that relates to men being friends with women. Lmao
Last edited:
22:22:22
NO PAIN TRANCE CONTINUE
Last edited:
nush
Member
You didnt misinterpret and you can quote me next time.
Also, have an upvote.
The worst for me was keeping their names straight when my dance card was full.
Having the same pet name for them really helps
nush
Member
It really does if you give them different ones, seeing as most of them won't go anywhere. My roomate used to love the nicknames I came up with so he could track who I was talking about. Walmart chick, sister big tits, frog eyes, little leaf and that's all I can remember right now.
nush
Member
Simp farming is real guys.
West Texas CEO
GAF's Nicest Lunch Thief
It makes sense, though.
The average woman has way more options (with the opposite sex) than the average man does.
Days like these...
Have a Blessed Day
Did this thread hit close to home? In all seriousness penis enlargement would fix dating, at least for me.
West Texas CEO
GAF's Nicest Lunch Thief
Peggies
Gold Member
What can I say
. The Yoni wants what it wants. And what it doesn't want can still accompony me to some wedding.
Mistake
Member
This is the exact reason I don't remain friends after a breakup, despite every single one of them wanting to
Days like these...
Have a Blessed Day
Hung like an earring
West Texas CEO
GAF's Nicest Lunch Thief
Use a pump, man. It's worked for me. I used to be 4.5", but after 18 months of vigorous pumping, I'm now at 4.7".
Peggies
Gold Member
Use a pump, man. It's worked for me. I used to be 4.5", but after 18 months of vigorous pumping, I'm now at 4.7".
Peggies
Gold Member
T8SC
Member
Peggies
Gold Member
Not "fuck boys"... more like "there's a huge spider in my kitchen. Can you please come and kill it for me"boys.FTFY
Anyway, that was when I was young and rude. Now I have kids and I'm old, married and rude and don't have any friends anymore.
Last edited:
DeafTourette
Perpetually Offended
Maybe keep in mind that you can't have a woman who is a ten when you're a 3? Readjust your "standards" and act accordingly?
Days like these...
Have a Blessed Day
That extra .2 inches must get you all baddies!Use a pump, man. It's worked for me. I used to be 4.5", but after 18 months of vigorous pumping, I'm now at 4.7".
West Texas CEO
GAF's Nicest Lunch Thief
all the fatties.
Sushi_Combo
Member
Lot of incels lurk around these parts of the world ,they have horrible advice lol.
Last edited:
ForAcademicPurposes
Gold Member
Don't date.
Problem solved.
Problem solved.
nush
Member
If you look at it statistically, something like only 60% of modern men procreate. Meaning a good percentage either never find “the one” or perhaps refuse to have children altogether. But your odds are much higher now than they ever were in the past. Genetically, it was like less than 30% of all men had children. Literally 17 women were reproducing to every one man, lol.
So the best strategies are probably similar to back then. Power and wealth are almost universal guarantees. Therefore a solid job is going to be your best bet. Most women value security and stability, especially if they want children. Attractiveness and personality helps too, of course. But building a strong source of income and security can easily overcome any deficits in those other areas.
What’s most important is avoiding the negative incel pitfalls and just coming to terms with the idea that you don’t need a spouse or children to be happy and lead a fulfilling life. Historically many men never passed on their genes, but humanity still prospers and people still find worth in their lives doing other things. Don’t hinge your entire self worth on the idea that your only value is with being with a woman. It’s just not true.
Stats:
www.census.gov
psmag.com
So the best strategies are probably similar to back then. Power and wealth are almost universal guarantees. Therefore a solid job is going to be your best bet. Most women value security and stability, especially if they want children. Attractiveness and personality helps too, of course. But building a strong source of income and security can easily overcome any deficits in those other areas.
What’s most important is avoiding the negative incel pitfalls and just coming to terms with the idea that you don’t need a spouse or children to be happy and lead a fulfilling life. Historically many men never passed on their genes, but humanity still prospers and people still find worth in their lives doing other things. Don’t hinge your entire self worth on the idea that your only value is with being with a woman. It’s just not true.
Stats:
Census Bureau Releases First Ever Report on Men’s Fertility
About 61.6% of men (74.7 million men) age 15 and over are fathers, and of those, 72.2 million men have a biological child.
www.census.gov
8,000 Years Ago, 17 Women Reproduced for Every One Man
An analysis of modern DNA uncovers a rough dating scene after the advent of agriculture.
psmag.com
Tams
Member
No, no, no. Come join us in playing soggy biscuit.
bati
Member
Lol this won't work for everyone. I worked a few years abroad in one of the Eastern European countries. The women on average were hot af, just walking around the city in the summer would make your head spin. I worked in a multinational company and knew of some dudes who came there for this exact reason, and they couldn't get any tail at all, you could see and smell their desperation from 50m away. Absolutely no game at all. It wasn't about money, or looks, or dressing well, they just didn't know how to talk and make connections, and not just to the opposite sex.
I also want to stress that being a fuckboy isn't all the hype. I got into the best shape of my life during that period, and I purposely ditched my friends so I could go to the pool alone in the summer. I must've dropped like 10 20-25s over one summer just from this (I was mid 30s at the time). But what happened afterwards caught me offguard, my friends took notice and I started to feel their attitude towards me change. This was both men and women. It wasn't jealousy or envy or anything (especially from men, they were in happy relationships), more like pity. I was the one they were coming to for advice, help etc, because I was generally seen as reliable and trustworthy. Once I started roleplaying as Casanova this really negatively impacted all my friendships, with both men and women. I didn't really get it at the time, I was getting my dick wet with a different woman every few days, thinking I was on top of the world, but what I eventually realized is that most people tend to gravitate to stable people, and my actions were anything but. What really hurt me was that I did consider these people to be real friends, and had some level of respect for them, and seeing first hand how their opinion of me changed really made me take note and eventually change my ways.
Fast forward a few years, I got out of shape because I had to stop working out due to injuries. Moved countries, kept the friends, made new ones. Made a career switch that was probably the single best thing I ever did in my life for personal growth. For the first year I had no idea what comfort zone even looked like anymore. Just insane amounts of responsibility and stress. But I overcame it, and my confidence is now through the roof, and this is reflected in personal life as well. Talking to anyone comes naturally, be it a business partner, colleagues at work, random interactions on the train, at the store, you name it. I became friends with many of the women I work with. We talk shit all the time, go out often. What starts as a quick business call often turns into an hour long chat about random things because it's enjoyable. It feels natural, no one is forcing it. Women at work are actively trying to hook me up with their friends. Whenever we go for business conferences I'm their first choice for the designated driver because they know the trip will be fun. I'll roll up to the event with 4 laughing women coming out of the car and I've had people ask me - how do you do it? When I hit bad times, such as when I got badly sick or when my dog died, they were calling me every day to check up on me. Couple of them almost bought me a new puppy because they were afraid I wouldn't recover from grief. And it feels good to know that there are people in your life outside of your family that really care, because developing these kind of relationships is really hard.
In any case, I am once again seen as "the man". The one they reach out to when shit needs to get done or when advice is needed. And I like that, I really do. It opens up so many doors, both professionally and in personal life. And I see it in other people too, those who excel at their job and know how to socially navigate at least a little bit, people want to be near them. Regardless of looks, age, nationality, whatever.
tldr: My advice to anyone struggling is to build confidence. Work is an obvious vector for this because we spend so much time in our lives working. I don't even know if it translates to other things like hobbies, but if you think it has merit, by all means, go for it. And listen to other people. Conversations are a two way street, don't just wait for the cue to talk about yourself. Build trust. Actions mean more than your words. What happens after will be a result of how you conduct yourself, and opportunities might present themselves that you were oblivious to at first.
Lord Panda
The Sea is Always Right
The local