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[Arsic]

So my company volunteered me to go to this event in California to sponsors a hole for golf. Originally a co worker or my VP was going to attend but they couldn’t. I tried to get out of it but we paid $ to be here so here I am.

I’m at a table for 5ish hours or more.

I’ve never golfed in my life or rode in a golf cart. There’s no way to charge my phone either. No bathroom.

Ask me anything.

 

[German Hops]

How stank did you leave the golf cart seats?

 

[Chuck Berry]

If there's no bathroom can you just shit in a sandtrap? It's like a big litterbox anyway.

 

[Arsic]

How stank did you leave the golf cart seats?

Early in the morning and it’s overcast with 60 some degree weather.

My hog and nutters didn’t get a chance to marinate yet in any sweat so I’m fairly fresh.

I imagine the temp will pick up and then the khaki pants will begin to blossom a pungent aroma for me to inhale soon.

 

[DGrayson]

Can you get drunk on the company's dime?

 

[Arsic]

If there's no bathroom can you just shit in a sandtrap? It's like a big litterbox anyway.

I pissed on a tree when I arrived since I’m one of the middle holes. It’ll take them a few hours to get to me so I had time.

My friend told me to do it in the open so I get caught and charged for indecent exposure. Which of course made me more worried now to not get fired for whipping my dick out to piss in a bush.

 

[Arsic]

Can you get drunk on the company's dime?

I could get a little turnt up but I’m representing us at a customer event. So if I get fucked up it’s a bad idea.

Plus I gotta drive back tonight to my hotel, and all they got in this cooler is white claws and corona. I’m just chugging water.

 

[Alex Anderson]

I was gonna ask if you brought sunscreen but thankfully the cloud cover is taking care of your skins.

 

[StreetsofBeige]

Hot chicks driving the food and beer cart?

 

[Arsic]

I was gonna ask if you brought sunscreen but thankfully the cloud cover is taking care of your skins.

Yeah no sun screen but they did give me a little canopy if I needed it.

 

[Arsic]

Hot chicks driving the food and beer cart?

No chicks. So far it’s me on a hill bored shitless by myself reading GAF. This desperately needed one other attendee to sit at this with me so I don’t fall asleep.

The amount of bugs is also insane.

 

[T4keD0wN]

For how much do you plan to sell the movie rights?

 

[nush]

I went to some golf tournament event many years ago. It was a weeks casual work on one of the food stands good money. Anyway there was the main restaurant marquee and I was working on the pizza bar outside where it was the cheap seats. Being sponsored by a cigarette company the main marquee had free cigarette packets on all the tables so the waiters from there would come to me and exchange a pack of cigarettes for a slice of pizza. Nice black economy, and I took the cigarettes home and sold them to my neighbors. It was a very profitable week.

 

[Arsic]

For how much do you plan to sell the movie rights?

I’m open to offers.

It could work if Larry David directed. From a show about nothing to a movie about nothing.

There is a hawk that’s been circling me overhead likely thinking I’m dead due to lack of movement.

Make the hawk a suspense piece to the film , and a random big tiddy babe appears from time to time. I chase her into the bush but she disappears, only to find out at the end of the film there was no big tiddy lady and I was just having nocturnal emission horny nap dreams.

Inception style.

 

[nush]

No chicks. So far it’s me on a hill bored shitless by myself reading GAF.

 

[SJRB]

Bro just hit the ball into the hole bro, how hard can it be

 

[AJUMP23]

You better go drive a golf cart. They are fun.

Make the most out of it. Talk to everyone and let them know what your company does.

 

[German Hops]

You better go drive a golf cart. They are fun.

 

[Dirk Benedict]

Bro just hit the ball into the hole bro, how hard can it be

Right? Fuck Nature. Get in there!

 

[Mistake]

I didn't mind golf so much once I got the swing of things. I'd never go without a cart and cover though.

Any potential future contacts? Make the most of it if there are

 

[SlimySnake]

Next week on Gaf: Stuck inside Margot Robbie's pussy for 5 hours. No phone, no toilet, free food. What did i do to deserve this?

 

[cormack12]

Make an impression OP

 

[Dacvak]

So my company volunteered me to go to this event in California to sponsors a hole for golf. Originally a co worker or my VP was going to attend but they couldn’t. I tried to get out of it but we paid $ to be here so here I am.

I’m at a table for 5ish hours or more.

I’ve never golfed in my life or rode in a golf cart. There’s no way to charge my phone either. No bathroom.

Ask me anything.

Golfing is pretty fun. Assuming you’re not just there for eye candy, go shoot a few holes.

 

[Putonahappyface]

 

[Arsic]

Golfing is pretty fun. Assuming you’re not just there for eye candy, go shoot a few holes.

Idk how to golf and I am there for eye candy.

I have to man a table near a hole to promote the brand.

 

[j0hnnix]

Pull your pants down and run around screaming.

 

[Arsic]

Update:

I was giga embarrassed. Prior to the event I asked if we should be showing product, what to bring etc.

I was told gift cards, small giveaways, and a table cloth. That’s it.

Later see other companies had brought grills to make food for players, giving out shots of booze, had product to show, brought bean bag set ups to win prizes etc.

I gave away some golf balls, and 4 $25 gift cards. Brought no product to show.

I looked like, I’m sure, a full blown retard. More so than usual.

 

[Dacvak]

Update:

I was giga embarrassed. Prior to the event I asked if we should be showing product, what to bring etc.

I was told gift cards, small giveaways, and a table cloth. That’s it.

Later see other companies had brought grills to make food for players, giving out shots of booze, had product to show, brought bean bag set ups to win prizes etc.

I gave away some golf balls, and 4 $25 gift cards. Brought no product to show.

I looked like, I’m sure, a full blown retard. More so than usual.

Wow you didn’t even bring a grill to serve steaks and booze to the entitled golfers? What company do you work for so I know to never buy any of their products?

 

[Arsic]

Wow you didn’t even bring a grill to serve steaks and booze to the entitled golfers? What company do you work for so I know to never buy any of their products?

LG

Lmao

 

[What A Shame...]

You better go drive a golf cart. They are fun.

 

[Arsic]

Heard a great joke today:

Guy 1 had to pee so he went off in the brush near the hole.

Guy 2 yells at him “Hey! That’s a felony!”

Guy 1 “What? For pissing in the brush?”

Guy 2 “No. It’s a felony for a grown ass man to be fondling a little boys dick.”

 

[bitbydeath]

Update:

I was giga embarrassed. Prior to the event I asked if we should be showing product, what to bring etc.

I was told gift cards, small giveaways, and a table cloth. That’s it.

Later see other companies had brought grills to make food for players, giving out shots of booze, had product to show, brought bean bag set ups to win prizes etc.

I gave away some golf balls, and 4 $25 gift cards. Brought no product to show.

I looked like, I’m sure, a full blown retard. More so than usual.

 

[SJRB]

Colleague of mine just came back from the golf course for some sponsor charity event or whatever, dude saw the worst player ever. The guy was swinging like no tomorrow but couldn't get past #7 or whatever, hilarious. The guy kept checking his phone, probably asking Reddit for help or something.

What's even worse, the dude forgot the merchandise for the sponsored event, lmao. Can you imagine?

Dude's getting fired for sure, lol.

 

[Snaggletooth]

I’m at a table for 5ish hours or more.

I’ve never golfed in my life or rode in a golf cart. There’s no way to charge my phone either. No bathroom.

Ask me anything.

Watch the video of David Blaines Hot Ones interview where he was buried alive for 7 days and had to hold it in the whole time.

10.45 mark.