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Have I been wiping my ass wrong this entire time?!?!?

S

Son Tofu

Banned
TrainedRage said:
I am tho. I just find that when I push a bit while wiping it cleans my asshole better. Thanks for the concern :messenger_heart:

I will keep you updated about my BM's.
Click to expand...
I just read that they have hole tightening surgery. So not all hope is lost. I hope everything works out for your ass.
 
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CyberPanda

CyberPanda

Banned
Son Tofu said:
I just read that they have hole tightening surgery. So not all hope is lost. I hope everything works out for your ass.
Click to expand...
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TrainedRage

TrainedRage

Banned
888

888

Member
I personally want a bidet. I want to sip tea and spray my asshole.

I recently tried the turn around and wipe front to back and that shit requires some flexibility. That’s one thing I am not. So screw that shit I’m ordering a bidet.
 
Stouffers

Stouffers

Banned
Gargus said:
Wipe till its clean. Then pull off about 10 inches of toilet paper and fold it and over and a couple times and put it up in your crack and you'll be fine all day. It's like a period pad, only for poop.
Click to expand...
When I was coming into my own, I would have to shove wads of TP down the front of my pants because I “leaked” like a mofo. This one time on a Disney World school trip, I was getting close with a young lady (I was also young at the time). I couldn’t stop leaking and had to continuously restuff the TP. On one of the re-stuffs, I forgot to completely shut the stall door and a few classmates saw me shoving it down my pants. They told everyone and complete ruined a budding relationship and a school trip.
 
Grinchy

Grinchy

Banned
Despite people saying otherwise, you also need to wipe in both directions. Wipe away from your bits a few times before wiping toward them, but definitely get that other direction in there because you are basically guaranteed to have wiped some onto the other side of that hole.

Also, turn your facet on just enough so droplets come out and wet the toilet paper with it.
 
Mistake

Mistake

Member
So basically op, it can be a number of things, like a history of stomach issues, straining too hard, constipation, sitting a lot, or even wiping too hard/too much. I had no idea about this either and ended up with the same problem, thanks to low quality tp at work scratching my ass. I got hems and had the issue ever since. I don't know about the prostate thing. But if you keep doing what you're doing, you'll make it worse. Try a new diet, kegal exercises, and tighten your ass when you wipe. This is also one thing bidets help prevent. You're right, it's not like anyone teaches you about these things, at least not until it's too late
 
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JareBear: Remastered

JareBear: Remastered

Banned
Team DudeWipes.

A fresh bum is a healthy bum. Fuck OG TP. Never going back

giphy.gif
 
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TrainedRage

TrainedRage

Banned
Ok.... in summation.

-Eat a healthy diet with whole grains and real food.
-Wipe from front to back, then back to front.
-Carry around wet butt wipes everywhere I go.
-Wipe going under my legs not around them (make it work even though we have a massive penis)
-Go see a butt doctor about my loose butthole.
-Try and clean my gully works out with some type of laxative.

Did I miss anything besides the video?
 
S

Son Tofu

Banned
Again, TrainedRage TrainedRage , I still think you need to be careful. I recently read an article about a man named Kenneth Pinyan that had similar problems that you outlined in your initial post. I heard he pushed a lot too. It ended badly for him.

Make sure you take care of your health, my fellow poster. I know you and Kenneth have some things in common.
 
Urprobablyright

Urprobablyright

Banned
People are being technical, so here's the environmentally conscious poop, err scoop*:

Take 3 squares of TP and fold them once, in half. Take your first wipe.

Inspect the wipe to know what you're dealing with and whether you should be chewing more before you swallow your morning nuts.

Fold in half again, use the shrunken but still reasonably well sized paper to go back in, go with a will and exact a generous turd tithe.

Fold in half once more, by now it should be roughly twice the width of a finger, use it for the final wipe.

You then fold it once more into a domino shape, if needs be this can be used as a finger cap to perform one last sanitisation. Either way, you inspect the final wipe surface.

If said surface remains stained, take another 2-3 squares and repeat the procedure until satisfied.

By the time you're done your deposit should resemble a triumphant snake in a state of repose with a few chunks of cookies and cream white chocolate perched atop it.

Total TP usage; 6 squares.

Permission to be poopsmug: granted.
 
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Punished Miku

Punished Miku

Member
TrainedRage said:
Ok.... in summation.

-Eat a healthy diet with whole grains and real food.
-Wipe from front to back, then back to front.
-Carry around wet butt wipes everywhere I go.
-Wipe going under my legs not around them (make it work even though we have a massive penis)
-Go see a butt doctor about my loose butthole.
-Try and clean my gully works out with some type of laxative.

Did I miss anything besides the video?
Click to expand...
Regular activity, including cardio, stretching, and of course abdominal / core exercises. People with injuries or handicaps literally develop constipation due to decreased movement as well. Simple things like gravity, and muscle contractions can also keep you regular.

Start with Miralax as your laxative. It literally just helps increase water storage in your intestines. It washes you out basically. It's the most mild one, and will get the job done. The rest is just diet changes, eating less at once, eating less cheese / dairy maybe, eating less bread.

And you did miss something else, the obvious answer is to just wash your ass. Superior toilets with this feature do exist, and when combined with all the above advice, it will fix your issue.
 
GymWolf

GymWolf

Gold Member
Whoever doesn't use a sponge for deep cleaning after the paper is wiping wrong.

Learn how to clean your assess, americans :lollipop_blowing_kiss:
 
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B

Breakage

Member
Wipe with toilet paper until clean and then shower with soap/shower cream/shower gel i.e. something that smells like a bouquet of flowers. No bidet involved. For me, that's the only acceptable way of getting clean. A lot of people in the west have a detachable shower unit, so there's no excuse really.
I dunno how people get by with just plain toilet tissue. The smell and bacteria are still gonna be there. I suppose the smell must be worse for women who only wipe with plain old toilet tissue . The mixture of residual poo, discharge, period matter, etc. must surely produce a rather disgusting odour. Perhaps that's another reason why women feel compelled to carry perfume and a spare pair of knickers in their hand bags.
 
ThatStupidLion

ThatStupidLion

Member
TrainedRage said:
Ok.... in summation.

-Eat a healthy diet with whole grains and real food.
-Wipe from front to back, then back to front.
-Carry around wet butt wipes everywhere I go.
-Wipe going under my legs not around them (make it work even though we have a massive penis)
-Go see a butt doctor about my loose butthole.
-Try and clean my gully works out with some type of laxative.

Did I miss anything besides the video?
Click to expand...

Id also add “apply a bit of pressure when scrubbing The Hole.”

Its a fine line of how much pressure you use to dig, but thats for you to determine. Who am i to tell you how much pressure you like

What youre experiencing is the remaining poo left on the inner sphincter.
 
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TindalosPup

TindalosPup

Member
A suggestion I haven't seen yet that could help: change your poop positioning. Toilets aren't designed for the position your body is supposed to be in to defecate, the human in nature is meant to squat, so in short when you sit on a toilet your bum is tense and isn't in optimal pooping position to release them solids. Products like Squatty Potty try to cash in on it, but leaning forward can also help
 
nkarafo

nkarafo

Member
If you want to be completely clean with no more poop on TP even after you squeeze, just take a small syringe (without the needle ofc) and push a little bit water in your ass. Like a mini enema. Push that out, wipe and enjoy your crystal clear rectum for the rest of the day.
 
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Diddy X

Diddy X

Member
TindalosPup said:
A suggestion I haven't seen yet that could help: change your poop positioning. Toilets aren't designed for the position your body is supposed to be in to defecate, the human in nature is meant to squat, so in short when you sit on a toilet your bum is tense and isn't in optimal pooping position to release them solids. Products like Squatty Potty try to cash in on it, but leaning forward can also help
Click to expand...

Leaning forward will still not be the optimal position as your rectum won't be vertical so poop will struggle to get out more than supposed.
 
Jaxx_377

Jaxx_377

Neo Member
No matter how many threads I read on Gaf about poop, just about everytime I come back there is another poop thread.

Kinda Ironic given your circumstances.

As I have gotten older and busier and I tend to eat out more with less time to cook I seem to be having the same issue.

Eat better, Drink more water and Get flushable wipes to clean your ass right if you don't have access to a bidet or get a bidet, it's worth it.
 
NeoIkaruGAF

NeoIkaruGAF

Gold Member
You wipe... back to front? Eeeewwww.

Seriously, every time I read one of these threads I thank whatever God's in the sky I was born in a country where bidets are basically mandatory.
 
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