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[3phemeral]

I don't have my glasses but I could swear Camillelang's doppelganger just walked into a Panera I'm studying at - and with a guy Downish-looking friend seated across from her.

Spoiler

I repeat, I am not wearing my much-needed glasses for long-distance viewing.

Pample, you should rush over.

I hope you enjoy it! ^.^ Like I said, it does have a bit of a slow start. If I would fault it for anything, it would be that but I still quite enjoy how it sets itself up and where the whole thing goes.

I hope so too, so I super appreciate the recommendation

Where are you then? I thought you were in Texas?

Some of us ONLY do oral, so I would hate to be considered a "virgin" just because I haven't partaken in an act I have no interest in doing.

Well, how does "half virgin" sound?

 

[RatskyWatsky]

3phemeral do you have a MyAnimeList

 

[3phemeral]

3phemeral do you have a MyAnimeList

I have no idea what that is. I'm guessing it's a site in which you organize your Anime watch-list queue?

 

[Kevyt]

Hmm, I've heard this before.



What would you say about other forms of sexual acts, like

Spoiler

handjobs, mutual masturbation, and penetration involving sex toys (receiving or giving)

?

Spoiler

For some reason, I felt like I should spoiler tag that.

I'm not entirely sure. I'd say no.

That's not comforting at all dude. 😭

It's not about the sex, it's more about the companionship for me. I want for that.

True. Yet you can find companionship from friends and family.

 

[Pamplemousse]

Also, if you don't mind me asking, do you identify as a "side"?

What's a side?

 

[Ahasverus]

That's not comforting at all dude. 😭

It's not about the sex, it's more about the companionship for me. I want for that.

The worst is when you can only have one :/

 

[CornBurrito]

Where are you then? I thought you were in Texas?.

ohio

 

[RatskyWatsky]

I have no idea what that is. I'm guessing it's a site in which you organize your Anime watch-list queue?

It's a place where you can track which series you've watched and you can rate them and stuff like that. I was just curious to see which series you've already seen and how you felt about each one.

 

[DOWN]

I don't have my glasses but I could swear Camillelang's doppelganger just walked into a Panera I'm studying at - and with a guy Downish-looking friend seated across from her.

Spoiler

I repeat, I am not wearing my much-needed glasses for long-distance viewing.

Pample, you should rush over.

I wish! She's in Texas and I'm in Florida at the moment

 

[Ahasverus]

"Virginity" is a ridiculous (and super heteronormative- hence why oral/anal/digital sex are often left out as qualifiers over the almighty PIV) concept with origins in maintaining the purity of women and our precious, easily ruinedT vaginas prior to being married off. I can't believe you guys are seriously discussing it like it has any value, lmao.

Social-wise it shouldn't hold value relly, now personal wise it could or not be relevant to your interests, discussing it as an experience is ok imo.

Have you traveled abroad for sex? like, to another state, far away city, or country, I'd love to do that, well not only for the sex, but like for a person on a fleeting adventure, that would be an awesome surreal experience.

Spoiler

If anyone wants to invite me over, well

 

[Kevyt]

Have you traveled for sex? like, to another state, or country, I'd love to do that, well not only for the sex, but like for a person on a fleeting adventure, that would be an awesome surreal experience.

Spoiler

If anyone wants to invite me over, well

You're always welcome here! I would have payed for your ticket here if I still had my old job. Not for sex though... but because I'm a good person!

OMG! We can totally bone then. I have family I visit in Columbus all the time.

Have fun you two!

And remember, cap it before you tap it!

 

[Pamplemousse]

ohio

OMG! We can totally bone then. I have family I visit in Columbus all the time.

 

[3phemeral]

It's a place where you can track which series you've watched and you can rate them and stuff like that. I was just curious to see which series you've already seen and how you felt about each one.

Oh, I see. So it's kind of like a scrobbler of sorts. The only Anime I could possibly rate with be Ghibli films as stuff I've remembered fondly I've tried to re-watch, only to discover it's not as great as I remembered. Princess Mononoke is my absolute most favorite Anime, followed closely by Spirited Away. I just love the sense of world, atmosphere, magic, and creativity those movies encompass. Gargantia isn't too bad itself and keeps the fan-service to a minimum. They could completely remove that one episode involving the "trans people are for humor" and it probably wouldn't even change a damn thing.

My "guilty pleasure" would be the dubbed version of Ghost Stories but the jokes become increasingly repetitive and needlessly offensive as you reach the latter episodes.

I wish! She's in Texas and I'm in Florida at the moment

I'll be in your state the end of February

Spoiler

(but probably not the same city).

 

[Ahasverus]

OMG! We can totally bone then. I have family I visit in Columbus all the time.

 

[CornBurrito]

OMG! We can totally bone then. I have family I visit in Columbus all the time.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well I'll keep that in mind.

 

[Aarglefarg]

Social-wise it shouldn't hold value relly, now personal wise it could or not be relevant to your interests, discussing it as an experience is ok imo.

Have you traveled abroad for sex? like, to another state, far away city, or country, I'd love to do that, well not only for the sex, but like for a person on a fleeting adventure, that would be an awesome surreal experience.

Spoiler

If anyone wants to invite me over, well

You are invited to Melbourne, AU.

Everything I wrote? Interesting. I wonder how perceptions of "sex" vary across genders, sexualities, regions of the world, etc.

Everything and more. I'm not in it but would guess sex to be defined very broadly in a BDSM community.

 

[3phemeral]

OMG! We can totally bone then. I have family I visit in Columbus all the time.

Spoiler

Please don't do this.

 

[Blood Diamonds]

I'm a literal virgin tbh but it doesn't bother me idk

 

[RM8]

It's probably a common experience. Was it like romantic attachment or a different closeness?.

In hindsight, I probably felt more like her brother, lol. I don't have sisters and my only female friends are my friend's girlfriends even to this day.

 

[RatskyWatsky]

"Virginity" is a ridiculous (and super heteronormative- hence why oral/anal/digital sex are often left out as qualifiers over the almighty PIV) concept with origins in maintaining the purity of women and our precious, easily ruinedT vaginas prior to being married off. I can't believe you guys are seriously discussing it like it has any value, lmao.

the construct of male virginity is still very much still a thing

when people start discussing what does or doesn't "count" as """ real""" sex I have to roll my eyes. zzzz

oh ya, i agree

 

[RM8]

At 22 I definitely felt uneasy about not having any experience with guys, but eh, it's really not a big deal. I remember literally thinking "why was I making a deal about this?". I don't think it's this life changing experience people believe it to be prior to experiencing it. But then my sex drive has never been particularly strong :x

 

[Ahasverus]

You are invited to Melbourne, AU.

*Marks calendar* Melbourne sounds awesome, I actually applied for a scholarship there, almost got it (there were 2 places and I got third) <3 Still coudn't have gone but that city sounds amazing. Thank you Aarglefarg

You're always welcome here! I would have payed for your ticket here if I still had my old job. Not for sex though... but because I'm a good person!

Aww I dunno where you live, Texas isn't it? These days would be magical for me as I haven't seen snow, well asides from the snow mountain that can be seen from my city.

Please come visit GayGaf, Colombia is ultra cheap these days thanks to exchange rates, you could come to a five stars hotel in my city for a mere $40/night (I think it's cheaper these days). We're fun, I promise.

I'm a literal virgin tbh but it doesn't bother me idk

Having sex with Lana music is a-m-a-z-i-n-g. Please try it your first time.

 

[Aarglefarg]

In hindsight, I probably felt more like her brother, lol. I don't have sisters and my only female friends are my friend's girlfriends even to this day.

I almost asked if it was like as a sister. I've heard of that familial-style closeness to describe feelings from this type of relationship.

 

[Aeriscloud]

I'm a literal virgin tbh but it doesn't bother me idk

Pfft, you're too cute to stay a virgin as long as I have, but at least it doesn't bother you, yet.

 

[Kevyt]

*Marks calendar* Melbourne sounds awesome, I actually applied for a scholarship there, almost got it (there were 2 places and I got third) <3 Still coudn't have gone but that city sounds amazing. Thank you Aarglefarg

Aww I dunno where you live, Texas isn't it? These days would be magical for me as I haven't seen snow, well asides from the snow mountain that can be seen from my city.

Please come visit GayGaf, Colombia is ultra cheap these days thanks to exchange rates, you could come to a five stars hotel in my city for a mere $40/night (I think it's cheaper these days). We're fun, I promise.

Having sex with Lana music is a-m-a-z-i-n-g. Please try it your first time.

Hmmm... I'd love to visit Colombia!

Maybe once I'm finally settled place-wise, job and school. Basically when I have my life in order.

 

[Haly]

I feel like I can't be sure I'm really bi until I have sex with a dude. Until then I'm only comfortable being bicurious, which is like Schrodinger's bisexual. It's an identity thing.

I just want to collapse my sexual wave function.

 

[3phemeral]

Until then I only comfortable being bicurious, which is like Schrodinger's bisexual.

I just want to collapse my sexual wave function.

Talking to me like that back when I was single might have granted you access to this temple.

 

[Kevyt]

Talking to me like that back when I was single might have granted you access to this temple.

But temples are never closed.

Or at least they're not meant to be. I've found a loophole!

 

[Aarglefarg]

*Marks calendar* Melbourne sounds awesome, I actually applied for a scholarship there, almost got it (there were 2 places and I got third) <3 Still coudn't have gone but that city sounds amazing. Thank you Aarglefarg

It is a good city, we have these poles:

And we got rid of these other poles so don't worry:

Melbourne is a beautiful city, as is Sydney. I visited both in December and I'd definitely recommend both. Australia is like America, but cleaner, more efficient, more humane, and generally better in every way.

Glad you enjoyed it.

 

[Ahasverus]

It is a good city, we have these poles:

And we got rid of these other poles so don't worry:

Glad you enjoyed it.

Wow.. I accepted your invitation, you know.

How about a long distance relationship, or is physical presence part of companionship for you?

A long distance relationship is totally fine if there is hope of seeing each other, and the rules are clear of course. I know that platonic not physical love very well, and I can safely say it's real and can be done, yet it's the most fragile. I'd advise for them if both partners know what they want for each other.

I find the concept of gay love very beautiful, almost irrational yet stormingly real.

....
Top of the page again omg omg. Wait for it. You know you want it.

Who doesn't want a bad boy in their lives.

 

[Vazra]

But temples are never closed.

Or at least they're not meant to be. I've found a loophole!

You implying 3phe was a thot?

 

[3phemeral]

But temples are never closed.

Or at least they're not meant to be. I've found a loophole!

You implying 3phe was a thot?

 

[Vazra]

Oh you're a Venus Fly Trap? (or Mars would be more accurate? LOL)

 

[Aarglefarg]

I feel like I can't be sure I'm really bi until I have sex with a dude. Until then I'm only comfortable being bicurious, which is like Schrodinger's bisexual. It's an identity thing.

I just want to collapse my sexual wave function.

I read about a factor that seemed to cause risky sexual behaviour for young bi men, which was feeling a need to have sex with multiple men and women in order to prove their sexuality. Considering the social messages of doubt, it's kinda understandable that this would happen.

 

[VegiHam]

I feel like I can't be sure I'm really bi until I have sex with a dude. Until then I'm only comfortable being bicurious, which is like Schrodinger's bisexual. It's an identity thing.

I just want to collapse my sexual wave function.

Absolutely use that line to pick up a cute physicist guy*. "Hey baby, wanna help me collapse my wave function through experimental research?"

*I assume these exist. Never met one but they must be out there somewhere.

 

[Deleted member 465307]

What's a side?

I'm not sure how widespread it is, but it's a term that I've seen around in a couple places. It's typically used to signify a gay or bi man who doesn't really do anal sex and is into other forms of sexual intimacy (like oral). I'm not sure if it means the person never does anal or just doesn't like it, but I suppose those can be somewhat the same. I don't know the origins of the term, but it's supposed to be an alternative to top/bottom/vers.

Ignoring that age of consent in some jurisdictions is really young - like, 13 or 14 - there is a fairly big gap between an 18 or 19 year old and someone in their early or mid 20s in terms of maturity and experience in life generally, not just sexually. But I suppose it would matter less if you're literally only considering them as a sex partner and absolutely nothing else.

I agree with what you say about ages. While I was in college, the older I got, the more I realized how much I was changing. The pressures that a senior in college experiences (graduating, finding a direction in life, etc.) are completely different from the pressures that a freshman will experience (figuring out a social identity, adapting to life away from home, etc.). There's also the emotional maturity and perspectives I gained as I aged. Maybe I was oddly immature when I entered college, but I think many people experience the changes I experienced. I went on a date with a sophomore when I was a senior, and I was stunned by how much distance there was between us when it came to general attitudes, worries, and priorities,, thanks to our different academic years. Also, I can't imagine dating someone still in college if they aren't working or living off-campus (basically, someone who's totally absorbed into their college life) because the perspectives and types of living are just too different.

I mean, I get talking about your first sexual experiences (or lack of), but when people start discussing what does or doesn't "count" as """ real""" sex I have to roll my eyes. zzzz

I'm not sure if this was directed at me (since I started the discussion and all), but I would like to explain my motivation for asking about how people define "virginity." I find it very interesting that the idea of "virginity" is very widespread, but in my experience, people have very different definitions of what it means. I have seen people who don't consider themselves virgins be called virgins by others because they have different ideas of what "virgin" communicates, and I'm pretty sure I've seen the opposite as well. It's fascinating to me because I think a question that may be asked in a relationship early on (or a topic that might be discussed) is "Are you a virgin?" in order to understand the two individuals' sexual compatibilities and histories. But such a question can only be a conversation starter, as seen by the varying definitions that many in this thread hold. I find it fascinating that it's a somewhat "universal" concept that is far from being so, which I suppose makes it more mythical than anything.

I find the concept of gay love very beautiful, almost irrational yet stormingly real.

This sentence is beautiful. I don't know if I've ever seen "stormingly" before, but I love the sentiment it evokes. If someone I was crushing on were to send me this sentence in a text, I would swoon.

Absolutely use that line to pick up a cute physicist guy*. "Hey baby, wanna help me collapse my wave function through experimental research?"

*I assume these exist. Never met one but they must be out there somewhere.

They do.

 

[GoStc]

Welp, I had my first sexual experience/kiss/everything

Spoiler

two months ago

when I was 22. I'm 23 now. So, yeah, experience has nothing to do with age I guess :]

 

[VegiHam]

They do.

Also, on the topic of all this sexual experience stuff, the older I get the more I feel kinda insecure about my lack of experience in certain fields of sexual endeavour.

 

[RatskyWatsky]

Oh, I see. So it's kind of like a scrobbler of sorts. The only Anime I could possibly rate with be Ghibli films as stuff I've remembered fondly I've tried to re-watch, only to discover it's not as great as I remembered. Princess Mononoke is my absolute most favorite Anime, followed closely by Spirited Away. I just love the sense of world, atmosphere, magic, and creativity those movies encompass. Gargantia isn't too bad itself and keeps the fan-service to a minimum. They could completely remove that one episode involving the "trans people are for humor" and it probably wouldn't even change a damn thing.

My "guilty pleasure" would be the dubbed version of Ghost Stories but the jokes become increasingly repetitive and needlessly offensive as you reach the latter episodes.

Ghibli is pretty much the gold standard when it comes to Japanese animation, yeah. Have you seen any of Satoshi Kon's work? His stuff is much darker than Ghibli's and deals with more mature subject matter, but it's also very good. He has 4 films - Perfect Blue, Paprika, Millennium Actress, and Tokyo Godfathers and 1 series - Paranoia Agent.

I would also recommend Serial Experiments Lain (a very dense, surreal, philosophical work) if you haven't already seen it, as well as Haibane Renmei (which is a more conventional, quiet slice of life where humans and angels co-exist in a town surrounded by a huge wall).

Alsoo, I would recommend the films of Makoto Shinkai, specifically 5 Centimeters Per Second, Voices of a Distant Star, and She and Her Cat (the OVA). Children Who Chase Lost Voices is decent, but also marks a departure for Shinkai in that it was his attempt at making a Ghibli style movie and unfortunately that isn't his forte (which is very beautiful, slow moving, somber, narratively sparse pieces).

 

[Interframe]

I read about a factor that seemed to cause risky sexual behaviour for young bi men, which was feeling a need to have sex with multiple men and women in order to prove their sexuality. Considering the social messages of doubt, it's kinda understandable that this would happen.

I'm a 21 year old bi dude who's managed to stay celibate except for having sexual relations with another guy in my teenage years, but that was it. Even though I'm attracted to both genders, I don't actively seek sexual activity to prove it, but I can totally understand the social pressure of trying to prove something. I even have internal conflicts and confusion from time to time myself. It's difficult to get a grasp of being so sexually fluid.

 

[Mostmanlyman]

I'm a 21 year old bi dude who's managed to stay celibate except for having sexual relations with another guy in my teenage years, but that was it. Even though I'm attracted to both genders, I don't actively seek sexual activity to prove it, but I can totally understand the social pressure of trying to prove something. I even have internal conflicts and confusion from time to time myself. It's difficult to get a grasp of being so sexually fluid.

Yeah im same way. But i havent had any relationships, so i will sometimes have those internal conflicts. But im still in highschool and rather not rush into anything.

 

[Grakl]

Whenever I'm in NYC I'm surprised at how gay it is

 

[Interframe]

Yeah im same way. But i havent had any relationships, so i will sometimes have those internal conflicts. But im still in highschool and rather not rush into anything.

Yeah definitely don't rush into anything, the guy who I had sexual relations with was somebody I was was close to and very much like a best friend. IMO, having sex with strangers isn't quite the same experience as somebody your close to and care deeply about, its like another world. Unless your somebody who doesn't mind having sex with no strings attached, I'd say if your bi curious, its more worth to try dating somebody of the same sex first. It'll be more difficult but more worth it in the end vs just hooking up for a night.

 

[berzeli]

Ghibli is pretty much the gold standard when it comes to Japanese animation, yeah. Have you seen any of Satoshi Kon's work? His stuff is much darker than Ghibli's and deals with more mature subject matter, but it's also very good. He has 4 films - Perfect Blue, Paprika, Millennium Actress, and Tokyo Godfathers and 1 series - Paranoia Agent.

Seconding this. Satoshi Kon is amazing.

 

[Haly]

Whenever I'm in NYC I'm surprised at how gay it is

Oh right speaking of.

I want to ask LesGAF if you can identify other lesbians in public. With gays it's pretty obvious. Because of the bro code and the standard crotch distance that must be maintained at all times, it's easy to spot gays because they're holding hands or hugging or are just very close, but with women I just can't tell if they're lesbians or just friends. Statistically, there shouldn't be any more gays than lesbians in NYC but I've seen my fair share of gay couples and yet not a single lesbian couple I accurately identified.

Or is it that lesbians just aren't into PDA like gays are?

 

[Mostmanlyman]

Yeah definitely don't rush into anything, the guy who I had sexual relations with was somebody I was was close to and very much like a best friend. IMO, having sex with strangers isn't quite the same experience as somebody your close to and care deeply about, its like another world. Unless your somebody who doesn't mind having sex with no strings attached, I'd say if your bi curious, its more worth to try dating somebody of the same sex first. It'll be more difficult but more worth it in the end vs just hooking up for a night.

Oh yeah i way rather be dating someone then just a random hook up, defiantly for my first time.
I still need to come out to my parents, i think they would be a bit surprised if i brought a guy home especially for my first date. I have been wanting for a time where i can just tell my mom but i haven't gotten that time yet.

 

[Ekai]

Ghibli is pretty much the gold standard when it comes to Japanese animation, yeah. Have you seen any of Satoshi Kon's work? His stuff is much darker than Ghibli's and deals with more mature subject matter, but it's also very good. He has 4 films - Perfect Blue, Paprika, Millennium Actress, and Tokyo Godfathers and 1 series - Paranoia Agent.

I would also recommend Serial Experiments Lain (a very dense, surreal, philosophical work) if you haven't already seen it, as well as Haibane Renmei (which is a more conventional, quiet slice of life where humans and angels co-exist in a town surrounded by a huge wall).

Alsoo, I would recommend the films of Makoto Shinkai, specifically 5 Centimeters Per Second, Voices of a Distant Star, and She and Her Cat (the OVA). Children Who Chase Lost Voices is decent, but also marks a departure for Shinkai in that it was his attempt at making a Ghibli style movie and unfortunately that isn't his forte (which is very beautiful, slow moving, somber, narratively sparse pieces).

Heh. I had mentioned Makoto Shinkai and Satoshi Kon earlier too. They're easily the best recent anime directors and probably my favorite anime fim directors period. I would also add Michael Arias to the list as well, he directed Tekkon Kinkreet. I miss Kon greatly and really hate Aronofsky a lot for what he did to stab Kon in the back while he was dying of cancer.

Haibane and SEL are also great suggestions.

 

[Monocle]

....
Top of the page again omg omg. Wait for it. You know you want it.

Who doesn't want a bad boy in their lives.

100% YES. This hunk gets top marks.

 

[Deleted member 465307]

Oh yeah i way rather be dating someone then just a random hook up, defiantly for my first time.
I still need to come out to my parents, i think they would be a bit surprised if i brought a guy home especially for my first date. I have been wanting for a time where i can just tell my mom but i haven't gotten that time yet.

Let chemistry boy be the one to worry about that.

 

[Aarglefarg]

I'm a 21 year old bi dude who's managed to stay celibate except for having sexual relations with another guy in my teenage years, but that was it. Even though I'm attracted to both genders, I don't actively seek sexual activity to prove it, but I can totally understand the social pressure of trying to prove something. I even have internal conflicts and confusion from time to time myself. It's difficult to get a grasp of being so sexually fluid.

Some Aarglefacts: I haven't had sex with a woman yet, since my ex-girlfriend didn't go there, and kinda-dating (not calling it that but eating at a restaurant/seeing movies) with another woman didn't lead to a relationship since she was hurt from a previous relationship. But I've had sex with the two boyfriends I've had and one guy who might have become one but didn't. I don't have doubts, I know what I like, but it would be good when it happens.