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Human beings as currency. How many would you spend?

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Pandaman

Everything is moe to me
MultiCore said:
So many people are so desperate for an afterlife, and you would begrudge them their ultimate desire?
hey, i still got the cheap model. i just dont see a need to spend an extra 150,000 for people who are already dead.
 
A year is long enough to set up a system using the most advanced cryptographic methods to find and pay several million anonymous women to give us what we can call "birth-coins".
 

inky

Member
Well, there is an undoubted surplus of politicians, most of which were democratically elected to serve the general public, so I'd say we start from there. I would have no problem at all suggesting my own president, his secretaries and essentially every elected official of my country as candidates for the trade. That at least should buy us the disease curing vaccine and the clean energy. Humanity would benefit greatly from both.

To tell you the truth I am sure a lot of people would willingly sacrifice themselves for this as well, but I also trust humanity to fuck it up somehow, of people in power to try to benefit particularly by any of this and probably even start a war somehow.

I doubt anyone in the world (or very few select people for it to matter) would reject the offer. We are greedy as hell, and this basically guarantee us stuff we've been trying to get for thousands of years. More people have died for stupid wars than we'd need for this.
 

Pandaman

Everything is moe to me
MultiCore said:
You know the PETA crowd would happily sacrifice you to spend eternity with their pets, right? lol

Fair enough though.
the enhanced model does pets too? i thought it just did the time travel thingy.

yea i'd totally purge another 150,000 to have a pet dinosaur after i die.
 

Locke562

Member
I'd just like to say I'm a huge fan of this thread. I think it would probably be easy enough to purchase everything through volunteers. The rest can come from Texas or Jersay.
 
Mama Robotnik said:
The Plebian Sexual Experiences Amplifier (schematics)

This is a pill about the size of an aspirin that when taken, will amplify the pleasures of sexual and erotic experience in a range, ten thousand to a million times what they are now. The pill will lead to blinding orgasms leaving you and your partner writing in a billion ecstasies for hours. The pill also makes sure that the human heart and brain does not explode as they would do if a human were to experience even a thousandth of such intense pleasure. The effect of the pill lasts for about six hours.

This package includes the recipe for the pill, easily manufactured from current Earth materials.

Cost: 3000 Human Beings

I can't tell if this would actually be something good.
 

DarthWoo

I'm glad Grandpa porked a Chinese Muslim
I'd probably buy the lot. The first picks would obviously be any current members of Al Qaeda, the Taliban, Gadhafi Loyalists, Kim Jong Il Loyalists, and so on. Do we actually have to be able to deliver the people or just name them so he can claim them himself?
 

Plywood

NeoGAF's smiling token!
I was thinking about Dr. Pleb today, he must've installed a device on me when I wasn't looking.

That said:

The Plebian molecular fusion generator
The Plebian Immunity Vaccine
The Plebian Environment Repairing Nanite Swarm
The Plebian Time Observer
The Plebian Faster than Light Drive
The Plebian Solar System shield
The Plebian Terraformation Torpedo

Those are all what I'd consider essentials, having the greatest orgasm is not an essential. Though it does sound like a blast but is totally unnecessary. Same with the The Plebian Internal Nanite Crew and the Plebian Afterlife ones.

I chose the Time Observer specifically to shut up conspiracy theorist and to also obtain exact history.


Total: 917,000 human beings
 

Drazgul

Member
DefectiveReject said:
I'd tell him he's been too kind and to take 100m.

I'd also ask how he'd get 1.5m on his damned ship

I'd trade a billion people for all that tech, I don't care.


We could always just mass-pardon all prisoners just before he comes back and then trade with them.
 

Cyan

Banned
SteelAttack said:
Mama, I would so buy a sci-fi book written around the premise of your OP.
Man, now I want to write a story like this. It'd have to be from the perspective of one of the people used as currency, of course... Hmm.
 

LOZLINK

Member
2471_currensymixtapedownload.jpg
 

Mudkips

Banned
Bart is wise:

Well, I hope they show the time where they traded guns to the Indians for corn, and then the Indians shot them, and took the corn.
 

wsippel

Banned
There are 7 billion people on this planet. Too many, anyway. I don't know 6.9999999 billion of them. I'm willing to spend as many of them as acceptable to keep a sufficient stock for genetic diversification. So basically... All but maybe a million.
 
Thanks for the nice comments those that like the thread!

7Th said:
Why the fuck is useless shit like the holodeck more expensive than what is essentially a perpetual motion machine?

I wonder if Dr Pleb thinks that humans might value toys that can fulfill their desires over things that might actually improve the planet as a whole, perhaps? That's one guess anyway.

cooljeanius said:
Mama Robotnik, I am constantly amazed by your boundless imagination. With that said, wouldn't some of these specifications allow us to get the humans we paid back afterwards? For example, with the Afterlife Nanite generator that gets everyone at any point in time, we could just put the afterlife switches onto everyone we were going to sacrifice to Dr. Pleb and then just get them back.

Dr. Pleb has expressed in the OP that the people he takes are not recoverable by the technologies provided.

Dr. Pleb also assures us that no matter what technological advances we purchase, we will still never be able to recover these people.

Even the Enhanced Afterlife Generator will not catch the "souls" of those submitted to him.
 

DarthWoo

I'm glad Grandpa porked a Chinese Muslim
Oh yeah, I almost forgot. I'd add sex offenders who are not currently in prison to the pot. The real ones though, not like the people who got busted for streaking or for doing it with their teen significant other while they were also a teen.
 

ArjanN

Member
Mama Robotnik said:
The Plebian Holodeck (schematics)

Dr. Pleb has watched our transmissions and is amused by the Star Trek holodeck. He will provide us with the schematics to build them so that they are refined from steel and plastic, easily producible, able to be installed in any spare room that is at least 2 meters squared, and uses the same amount of power as an electric light bulb.

The holodeck will function exactly as it does in the show.
Cost: 5000 Human Beings

So it'll malfunction horribly every week and nearly kill us?

How come the sex enhancing thing is three times as expensive as the thing that cures all sickness/diseases forever?

I'm pretty sure you could be several thousand volunteers, given that their fate isn't clear.

But the whole thing seems like some sort of lame alien morality test, because if Dr Pleb could actually provide all these things, why would he even need people.
 

ArjanN

Member
7Th said:
Why the fuck is useless shit like the holodeck more expensive than what is essentially a perpetual motion machine?

I'd be more excited about a actual holodeck than about a perpetual motion machine.

A holodeck can basically grant you 99.9% of all wishes you could think of in a way that's indistinguishable from reality.

A perpetual motion machine would have way less benefit to you as an inidividual IMO.
 

MultiCore

Member
SteelAttack said:
One fart of Dr. Pleb, delivered straight to your cerebral cortex.
I think he preemptively delivered on that one.

HellKarnassus said:
Is famine considered a terminal disease?
Yes, but so is life in general. But for this thought exercise, no.
 

Trojita

Rapid Response Threadmaker
The sex drug and the holodeck sound like an easy way to be vulnerable to getting hurt.

Does the pocket universe have each person living on an earth like planet with the rest of the back up copies? How the fuck does it work, you said consciousness so that sounds more like a backup of our minds would all be put be in some giant machine in the shape of a ball or like a cosmic cub.
 

DarthWoo

I'm glad Grandpa porked a Chinese Muslim
Here's a slightly similar scenario plucked from Babylon 5. Let us suppose that Jha'Dur, last survivor of the Dilgar race, offers you the plans for producing a serum that grants its user effective immortality. (Agelessness, but not immunity to death from illness or injury.) However, and though she is reluctant to tell you this, the production of one dose of the serum requires the murder of another living sapient being. In essence, one person can become immortal at the cost of another person's life. Would you accept the plans or turn her away?
 

Keikaku

Member
I love Dr. Pleb threads! My responses are bolded below.

Mama Robotnik said:
Do you tell Dr. Pleb to leave and never return, knowing what his technology could do for the future of mankind?
Fuck no, we need his tech!

Do you purchase his technology, and if so how do you choose which human beings become “payment”? Remember that anyone ill or in prison is disqualified.
Hell yes! I'd advocate the purchase of all of it. Hell, I'd also be one of the first people to volunteer to be one of the humans who would be the payment. I'd also set up either set up or attempt to join any organization that was actively looking for volunteers for payment. I think there would be at least 1.5 million humans who would volunteer. The elderly (who are not close to death), generally curious, xeno-obsessed or totally nuts would also be good candidates for payment. He never specified that mental patients wouldn't work.

Do you buy any of the schematics, and if so which ones?
All of them.

Do you think that if humans expand and continue to advance, we will need any of these technologies to survive?
The FTL drive, terraforming, environmental repair, power generation devices and immunity wonderdrug technologies would be pretty much required as they would make exploring the cosmos much easier. The solar system shield would be useful in case of hostile threats, the holodeck would progress science by leaps and bounds by providing a useful tool for laboratory experiments. So, yes :)

If a democratic vote was done all over the world, for people to choose whether to tell Dr. Pleb to leave or sell him the human beings, what would be the outcome?
You better believe people would be all for selling the shit out of other people. And they'd do it mighty quick. Heck, China alone would probably provide the names of any 1.5 million of it's healthy citizens just to get the tech.

My main issue would be more dealing with how the tech would be distributed. Who get's access to the schematics? Does everyone get to use the tech? How is access controlled.

If corporations/governments get their hands on it, you know damn well we'd be made to pay an arm and a leg for access to any of this stuff. There would also be an extreme polarization of high and low status people based on access to the tech.

Mama Robotnik, how does Dr. Pleb propose to distribute this technology? Which entity controls it? Will that entity be one person, a corporation or a government?
 
China would be all over this before we could come up with an answer, but I would personally give away as many humans as neccesary for that tech, specifically all the creationists/anti intelectual/anti science crowd, its a Win/Win/Win.
 
DarthWoo said:
Here's a slightly similar scenario plucked from Babylon 5. Let us suppose that Jha'Dur, last survivor of the Dilgar race, offers you the plans for producing a serum that grants its user effective immortality. (Agelessness, but not immunity to death from illness or injury.) However, and though she is reluctant to tell you this, the production of one dose of the serum requires the murder of another living sapient being. In essence, one person can become immortal at the cost of another person's life. Would you accept the plans or turn her away?

Yeah, I would, I don't need to kill a kid or a healthy person just a ill person, who will live just some hours anyway.
 

Sennorin

Banned
The whole setup here is really weak, MamaRobotnik. If you ask every single one of us if we´d sacrifice 1,5 million people for this awesome technology. Sure. You didn´t mention anything about "but it would include your family and friends", so if it´s just 1,5 million strangers, fuck them.

Now, what would make this a more interesting thought experience is the question as to what would realistically happen? What I mean is, can you imagine Obama announcing "Starting tomorrow, we will choose 1,5 million Americans that will be sacrificed for the greater good. I hope you´re all fine with that!" I doubt it.
So, rather than "would you do that?", I´d ask you "Do you think it would be even possible to do it?" I´d imagine WW3 is more likely to be the result of Dr Pleb´s offering.
 

Patapwn

Member
I'd just hit up Dr. Pleb's sexually awkward younger cousin, Dr. Prob, and ask him to give us all this shit in exchange for Michele Bachmann.
 

Atrus

Gold Member
I was going to say that they should screw themselves but given that apparently there are some sinister bad guys capable of torturing people for an eternity. I'd say that there are a few things that would be valuable to have.

The terraformer torpedoes, faster than light travel, many molecular fusion generators, environment repairing nanite swarms, and a couple solar shields.

I'm not sure what the costs would add up to but I'd be willing to wager a few hundred million people give or take (I'd suspect mostly men) so long as Dr. Pleb does the difficult work of simply beaming them up.

We don't put everyone into our prison system.

Pleb can take those affiliated with terrorist organizations like Al Qaeda or Hamas, the numerous militia groups and their warlords, the armies that support violent dictators, all individuals that have ever served time for violent crimes, those who sacrifice people for the sanctity of their personal beliefs, those involved in organized crime but are not yet convicted, and basically a long list of similar ideas plus the inclusion of myself into the payment and for Dr. Pleb to never return.

Never ask of others what you yourself are unwilling.
 

Branduil

Member
Voluntary method. Anyone who wants to sign up as a guinea pig for Dr. Pleb is free to do so. They can even specify which technology they want to sacrifice themselves for. If the numbers add up, they get to go. I'm sure a lot of people who feel they don't have much of a future on earth would volunteer.
 

mcrae

Member
wow, thoguht out post much? awesome.

1.5m humans, easy. more than that number would volunteer. not a hard question
 
D

Deleted member 81567

Unconfirmed Member
I don't understand why Mama Robotnik always makes these elaborate OPs when no one (including me) ever complies to them specifically.
 
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