To vote in your own self-interest is understandable, but does not absolve you of the results of that vote.
Sorry, not how that works. Collective action, collective responsibility. If Trump starts another Trail of Tears or Japanese internment - doubtful, but let me indulge in hyperbole - you don't get to say "Oh, well he said things, but I didn't think he was that bad, and I was voting in self interest."
You have a part in installing a certain type of power. Your vote results in that power being able to make executive and legislative choices. You absolutely have a responsibility.
You enjoy the rights and freedoms of your chosen government, likewise you must accept the responsibilities. To ignore that is just trying to offset potential guilt.
Not at all. You make decisions on the basis of the information you have at the time. If Trump does stuff far, far outside the scope of his rhetoric you have no more responsibility than any democrat who failed to support or offer a candidate with solutions pertinent to the problems you are experiencing. People who, no more or less greedily, chased solutions to their very real problems instead of (or not in addition to) solving problems to ensure a broader coalition which would keep democrats in power.
Also, you have phrased this as potential, future responsibility and guilt, markedly different than requiring conciliation from people who have committed no offence (again, this is not Trump or indeed Republicans I am referring to but democrats who didn't vote democrat).