-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
Guys at my girlsfriends workplace hitting on her
- Thread starter ethanny2
- Start date
cr0w
Old Member
Seriously, OP. Get out while you still can. You should have bolted a long time ago. You'll meet someone else.
hydrophilic attack
Member
Yikes, that update post
Your girlfriend seems legit crazy with that jealousy. I was #teamstay at the start, but now I'm all in on #teamdump
Your girlfriend seems legit crazy with that jealousy. I was #teamstay at the start, but now I'm all in on #teamdump
CertifiedFP
Member
As Tom Leykis would advise - Dump Her. You're in a toxic relationship here and definitely being cheated on. It's a lost cause.
...Are there any "good" relationship threads on GAF lol? I swear there's another "GF possibly cheating on me" thread here every week.
Though of course that begs the question further of whether or not these people actually have girlfriends and are making these stories up to look like playas.
That would be a good take-down, but your original post that person replied too was pretty bullshit. Years of marriage doesn't change that fact, so his original statement remains true imo.
"If you picked her up at a bustop in minutes guys who have hours will do it for sure behind your back!" is some pretty juvenile stuff as an absolute, dude. You having "I'm married" cred doesn't change that in the slightest.
The funny thing about this post is that the original poster was right. It was sexist to make that remark but the ether was just too good to ignore.
IISANDERII
Member
Does your girlfriend give out her number to those dudes?
always crazy bacon
Banned
I bet those women could judge her character a lot better than the OP.
Update: Sorry for the necro bump and late conclusion but here it is...
After my girlfriend got angry at me for eating cake at my housemates birthday party (background:my housemate is a girl who I have no interest in but have been friends with for 1 semester. When I would go out on the weekends I wouldn't know any parties so I would always go with her, but nothing ever happened and I really never even considered doing anything with her) and got angry at me because she thought I was looking at other women on Instragram we broke up and I kept my distance for a while.
Meanwhile at my house, my housemate who I have told numerous times to stop communicating with me because my girlfriend doesn't want me talking to her continues to invite me to go places and come downstairs to the first floor (where I live) and try to talk to me. I need somewhere to place the blame on losing my girlfriend (irrational I know) so I get increasingly angry at this girl and every time she tries to talk to me I am dismissive and I eventually block her on FB messanger because I don't want her in my life. I, however only blocked her on messenger, and did not know that you could had to block someone on the actual Facebook app as well. I try to do that too, but I am prompted for a login and I was angry at the time so I decide to do it later.
Flash -forward 1-2 weeks and I go back to my girlfriends house to get some stuff I left over there. I ask her if we can be friends and then try to date later once she trusts me, she agrees and we proceed to go to an arcade later that week. We had a good time and agree that we should get back to together, but I told her (2 weeks ago) that I had blocked my housemate from Facebook. She says she will only get back together with me with I show her I blocked my housemate. I show her my phone, but forgot I only blocked her on messenger and not the FB app, she proceeds to flip out. I tell her it was a mistake and I swear I thought I had her blocked , she temporarily believes me.
The next day she says she called her sister and her sister thinks that Im a liar and I didn't block her on purpose so she is convinced about that. She also uses the fact that Im a computer science major (wtf) to say that I should know how to use FB 100% so she thinks Im lying. I convince her otherwise again (somehow) and we agree to keep the relationship going and find a couples counselor to talk about this stuff.
We spend like 2 weeks together and have a great time playing video games, going out, etc... Everything seemed great. I help her move into her new place and later she tells me that she is still worried that I lied about sleeping with my housemate. She tells me about a dude at her workplace who is married to a co-worker but cheats on her with another co-worker. She imposes this situation on me, and declares that Im dating my housemate and cheating on my housemate with her, or that my housemate is cool with me sleeping with both of them. (Wtf) I tell her that shes crazy, and thats not the case. Keep in mind it is summer break and everyone (all my housemates) has left back to their respective homes so no one I know is still in this town.
She is a huge activist (for anything feminism, BLM, fair-trade anything basically) and participates in local events and has a tight knit group of activists that she regularly talks to on a group chat. There is a guy in her activist group that she has been friends with for years and they hang out/go drinking all the time. She says how much I had in common with my housemates as a reason for why I would have slept with her, I say the same thing about this guy in her activist group and she says while he is interested in her they are just friends. She also told me 1 week before I am not allowed to have any female friends anymore, I don't have that much in the first place so I thought, "okay I'll cross that bridge when I come to it". But the fucked up part in my mind is that she still has guys friends, including this guy in the activist group and the dudes at her work. Im getting angry, but I never say anything I am saving it for therapy for which we had an appointment which was a week away.
We blow over it again and go back to hanging out and playing games, like normal. I had sex with the night before (not bragging its part of the story read on), and she goes home to get ready for work later. I text her the next day if she wants to do something, she says she'll hang out with a girlfriend. I reluctantly say okay, because if Im not hanging out with her I have nothing to do (all my friends left and I am staying her just for her, I also want to go home for the summer). She then says she did not want to have sex with me last night but did anyway. I tell her she could have just told me, shes told me before and I respect her decision. She says "it doesn't matter now anyway". I ask her what she meant and she doesn't respond to me for 3 days.
After 3 days she said she just wanted some space, (understandable we spent the whole previous week together) I say okay you could have just told me. She says she still not over me and what she thinks I did with my housemate. She then says she doesn't want to date me because I am too young (she is 27 and I am 22 even though we are both college seniors) and claims I am immature. I argue my case, and she doesn't text back for another 5 days.
So here I am 5 days after, I think its over, but I want closure (Are we broken up? Why are we braking up? etc). She will not answer any of my calls or read my messages, so I am considering going to her house (or where she works) but I don't want to seem crazy, what should I do?
After my girlfriend got angry at me for eating cake at my housemates birthday party (background:my housemate is a girl who I have no interest in but have been friends with for 1 semester. When I would go out on the weekends I wouldn't know any parties so I would always go with her, but nothing ever happened and I really never even considered doing anything with her) and got angry at me because she thought I was looking at other women on Instragram we broke up and I kept my distance for a while.
Meanwhile at my house, my housemate who I have told numerous times to stop communicating with me because my girlfriend doesn't want me talking to her continues to invite me to go places and come downstairs to the first floor (where I live) and try to talk to me. I need somewhere to place the blame on losing my girlfriend (irrational I know) so I get increasingly angry at this girl and every time she tries to talk to me I am dismissive and I eventually block her on FB messanger because I don't want her in my life. I, however only blocked her on messenger, and did not know that you could had to block someone on the actual Facebook app as well. I try to do that too, but I am prompted for a login and I was angry at the time so I decide to do it later.
Flash -forward 1-2 weeks and I go back to my girlfriends house to get some stuff I left over there. I ask her if we can be friends and then try to date later once she trusts me, she agrees and we proceed to go to an arcade later that week. We had a good time and agree that we should get back to together, but I told her (2 weeks ago) that I had blocked my housemate from Facebook. She says she will only get back together with me with I show her I blocked my housemate. I show her my phone, but forgot I only blocked her on messenger and not the FB app, she proceeds to flip out. I tell her it was a mistake and I swear I thought I had her blocked , she temporarily believes me.
The next day she says she called her sister and her sister thinks that Im a liar and I didn't block her on purpose so she is convinced about that. She also uses the fact that Im a computer science major (wtf) to say that I should know how to use FB 100% so she thinks Im lying. I convince her otherwise again (somehow) and we agree to keep the relationship going and find a couples counselor to talk about this stuff.
We spend like 2 weeks together and have a great time playing video games, going out, etc... Everything seemed great. I help her move into her new place and later she tells me that she is still worried that I lied about sleeping with my housemate. She tells me about a dude at her workplace who is married to a co-worker but cheats on her with another co-worker. She imposes this situation on me, and declares that Im dating my housemate and cheating on my housemate with her, or that my housemate is cool with me sleeping with both of them. (Wtf) I tell her that shes crazy, and thats not the case. Keep in mind it is summer break and everyone (all my housemates) has left back to their respective homes so no one I know is still in this town.
She is a huge activist (for anything feminism, BLM, fair-trade anything basically) and participates in local events and has a tight knit group of activists that she regularly talks to on a group chat. There is a guy in her activist group that she has been friends with for years and they hang out/go drinking all the time. She says how much I had in common with my housemates as a reason for why I would have slept with her, I say the same thing about this guy in her activist group and she says while he is interested in her they are just friends. She also told me 1 week before I am not allowed to have any female friends anymore, I don't have that much in the first place so I thought, "okay I'll cross that bridge when I come to it". But the fucked up part in my mind is that she still has guys friends, including this guy in the activist group and the dudes at her work. Im getting angry, but I never say anything I am saving it for therapy for which we had an appointment which was a week away.
We blow over it again and go back to hanging out and playing games, like normal. I had sex with the night before (not bragging its part of the story read on), and she goes home to get ready for work later. I text her the next day if she wants to do something, she says she'll hang out with a girlfriend. I reluctantly say okay, because if Im not hanging out with her I have nothing to do (all my friends left and I am staying her just for her, I also want to go home for the summer). She then says she did not want to have sex with me last night but did anyway. I tell her she could have just told me, shes told me before and I respect her decision. She says "it doesn't matter now anyway". I ask her what she meant and she doesn't respond to me for 3 days.
After 3 days she said she just wanted some space, (understandable we spent the whole previous week together) I say okay you could have just told me. She says she still not over me and what she thinks I did with my housemate. She then says she doesn't want to date me because I am too young (she is 27 and I am 22 even though we are both college seniors) and claims I am immature. I argue my case, and she doesn't text back for another 5 days.
So here I am 5 days after, I think its over, but I want closure (Are we broken up? Why are we braking up? etc). She will not answer any of my calls or read my messages, so I am considering going to her house (or where she works) but I don't want to seem crazy, what should I do?
Jest Chillin
Member
Stop messaging. Stop calling. DO NOT GO TO HER HOUSE OR WORK. Just move on. Hell, head back home for the summer. That should hopefully help.
DO NOT GO TO HER HOUSE OR WORK.
DO NOT GO TO HER HOUSE OR WORK.
Yoshimitsu126
Member
Its not as exciting to say you got a new relationship to strangers. Thats kind of bragging about something we expect people to do.
Relationship drama? Everyone can relate and people love drama and it sticks out more.
Admiral Woofington
Member
why the fuck are you still pursuing this toxic relationship. Let her go. Jesus Christ man.
Yeah you need to just remove her from your mind OP. This Girl is no good. She's not good for you and even more she's not good for herself. If she can't get over all that paranoia now then how is she going to ever get to a point to trust you enough for the relationship to work?
Shpeshal Nick
aka Collingwood
After reading everything, just get out.
Your relationship sounds as toxic as the one I had with my ex. But at least my ex and I were together 4 years. You guys have been together 15 minutes and this is the shit that's happening?
I dumped my ex after 4 years when I realised I'd be in for a lifetime of stress if we stayed together.
We're both happily married to new people now.
Move on OP.
Your relationship sounds as toxic as the one I had with my ex. But at least my ex and I were together 4 years. You guys have been together 15 minutes and this is the shit that's happening?
I dumped my ex after 4 years when I realised I'd be in for a lifetime of stress if we stayed together.
We're both happily married to new people now.
Move on OP.
OG Shaka Zulu
Member
Cut her the fuck off man and move on. You shouldn't have let her bully you into dropping friends. She is projecting when she accuses you of cheating, she fucked around on you. She is 27 and you are 22 and inexperienced in life, she is running laps on you.
Stop wasting your youth with this person, you will die one day and will regret this waste of time.
Stop wasting your youth with this person, you will die one day and will regret this waste of time.
Ether_Snake
å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®å®
Typical GAF relationship thread.
"So I broke up with her, and told my housemate to stop talking to me because my girlfriend doesn't want me to."
"So I broke up with her, and told my housemate to stop talking to me because my girlfriend doesn't want me to."
LastGamer84
Member
Not to sound like a dick, but the fact that she keeps accusing you of cheating without any evidence, asking you not to have any female friends and claiming immaturity on your part while acting like a 15 year old tells me all I need to know:
She cheated on you, and is looking for any excuse to justify it, even retroactively.
Fuck that. She's playing stupid games with you while justifying her own indiscretions. Drop her, you do not need psycho drama like that. She's acting like a teenager, not a 27 year old woman.
She cheated on you, and is looking for any excuse to justify it, even retroactively.
Fuck that. She's playing stupid games with you while justifying her own indiscretions. Drop her, you do not need psycho drama like that. She's acting like a teenager, not a 27 year old woman.
AtomskEater
Member
She says she wants space so give it to her. Let her initiate contact, don't text, were I you I'd give her a few days to say something and then consider the bridge burned. If she can't be bothered to even text for nearly a week it doesn't sound good. I had an experience like that where I was going out with someone but we just got into arguments and eventually I'd contact them less and less. Decided to cut it off, was sad but in the end I felt better with less drama and rehashed arguments. And it sounds like she has serious jealousy issues. Anyway, sorry you're in this situation OP.
Edit: I can basically agree with the "GET OUT" posts since nothing about this relationship sounds healthy or good, but I know we're seeing a part of it and you want closure so presumably you would like to have at least one more conversation with her. But consider that she may not want to talk to you again, no closure given. And even if she does do you really think having her dictate who you can and can't be friends with and dropping communication randomly is worth taking her back?
Edit: I can basically agree with the "GET OUT" posts since nothing about this relationship sounds healthy or good, but I know we're seeing a part of it and you want closure so presumably you would like to have at least one more conversation with her. But consider that she may not want to talk to you again, no closure given. And even if she does do you really think having her dictate who you can and can't be friends with and dropping communication randomly is worth taking her back?
Cracklox
Member
Way too much drama OP. DO NOT go to her house or work. Stalker-y much
Agree
Agree
for the first time with a Collingwood supporter
Go the Bombers!
Yoshimitsu126
Member
Hey OP, I don't know if you know Pokemon but there's this game called Magikarp Jump for smart phones.
Now the great thing about this game is that its based on one of the most worthless Pokemon in the series. But the game makes the Pokemon so charming and you spend so much time on it. Like you feed it berries and train it up. Just so you can see if your fish can jump higher than the opponent.
What I'm getting at is Magikarp Jump is a fun game and you should try it out and let us know if you like it too.
Now the great thing about this game is that its based on one of the most worthless Pokemon in the series. But the game makes the Pokemon so charming and you spend so much time on it. Like you feed it berries and train it up. Just so you can see if your fish can jump higher than the opponent.
What I'm getting at is Magikarp Jump is a fun game and you should try it out and let us know if you like it too.
Look, uh, realtalk.
The only two things missing from this story are her faking a pregnancy and you contemplating suicide and then suddenly you'll be me this time last year.
I went through absolute hell and nearly lost it all over something I should have walked away from square one. I can't even hear the name "Katherine" without flinching, still; I see a psychiatrist weekly. Terrible stuff.
Your stress levels must be through the roof. This nonsense is just terrible for you. End it. End it. End it.
The only two things missing from this story are her faking a pregnancy and you contemplating suicide and then suddenly you'll be me this time last year.
I went through absolute hell and nearly lost it all over something I should have walked away from square one. I can't even hear the name "Katherine" without flinching, still; I see a psychiatrist weekly. Terrible stuff.
Your stress levels must be through the roof. This nonsense is just terrible for you. End it. End it. End it.
This, but we know he won't do that. So I'll wait for the next chapter of this fucked up relationship.
LOL, i know all advice says cut and run, but I am just
a) astonished we we're having fun and acting like everything is cool, she agreed to go to therapy then out of nowhere she decided to stop contacting me and flip out
b) Upset she doesn't even end it person, or EVEN in text
So im kinda mad about and just want to know the reason
Calamari41
41 > 38
Her behavior is not normal at all. You don't have to live like this.
I repeat: you do not have to live like this.
I repeat: you do not have to live like this.
These things happen. You dont always get closure. It's best it put it out of your mind and move on. Her saying she wanted space and not replying to you was her ending it.
Adam_Roman
Member
So, I'm just gonna quote my post from the last time this thread was active because it seems pretty applicable still.
Seriously. You can find someone way better for you. I've been in an abusive relationship before and I know you think it'll get better once you can explain everything they're paranoid about but trust me, you will never get that chance and she already believes you've slept with your housemate.
Seriously. You can find someone way better for you. I've been in an abusive relationship before and I know you think it'll get better once you can explain everything they're paranoid about but trust me, you will never get that chance and she already believes you've slept with your housemate.
Spoiled Milk
Banned
^ I bet that housemate will treat you well
Jest Chillin
Member
Yeah, it's shit when a person doesn't give closure but it happens. Odds are even if you two did talk about it in an attempt to get closure, it would just turn into another fight and you still wouldn't get closure because she doesn't want to give you any. She doesn't want to end this on any kind of amicable terms.
It's a lost cause. Head home for the summer and do you best to put her out of your mind.
None of this is healthy. Cut off contact, apologize to your housemate, and move on. There's no need for closure.
This. Do not go to see her. Don't message her anymore. She wanted an excuse to end it and go do other things so that's what she did. It's not going to be rekindled and even if it did, she would just pull the same shit later or you'd be worrying about if she will or not.
You're better off forgetting she exists and moving on to find someone who actually cares. If she messages you, you shouldn't even respond. It's just her getting bored with whatever she had going on currently and it will just reopen the wound. Ditch her number and move on.
Also, if the roommate is remotely attractive to you, stop blocking her and spend some time hanging out with her to see how it goes. She might be cool, you might have things in common, you might have fun... and more importantly, you might forget about your terrible ex. Hell, it would probably piss your ex off which is an added bonus.
AtomskEater
Member
I experienced that kind of hot-cold kind of feelings in the relationship I described above. Sometimes it felt like things were going great and then I'd realize nothing really changed about the fundamental problems we were having. I can't say if she feels the same way, but it's not all that weird. Especially if she often talks to other people about the relationship and they put ideas in her head.
You have to accept that sometimes you won't get closure and you aren't owed anything beyond what the other person is willing to say to you. In this case, nothing. If you keep obsessing over trying to contact her and show up at her house or work or whatever, it's going to get creepy fast. Stop texting and calling.
TheLaughingStock
Member
You stupid mother fucker. That downstairs pussy is so wet for you right now.
Lmao...
I think this might be just what the doctor ordered after all the Ls you've taken OP.
Yuuuup. Stop talking to the current girl, forget about her, and start talking to your housemate.You stupid mother fucker. That downstairs pussy is so wet for you right now.
She legit sounds like she has borderline personality disorder. If she doesn't get help for it stay the hell away. Trust me.
Steeped in a Sea of Games
Member
Dude, you come across as having no self-respect. A total wet blanket. You will end up pushing everyone close to you away and end up with nothing at the conclusion of this fiasco.
Similar threads
- Locked