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Accepting your lot in life

Synless

Member
"If your a loser in life, you chose it."

I once met a guy in the local shelter who had been a millionaire. You think he chose to end up sitting next to me in a fuckin soup kitchen? No. He didn't. He had a run of bad luck, got in over his head and it all went to shit. When I met him he was strung out on booze and spent his days selling magazines on a street corner. You think he chose that? You think when he was sitting up there in his king of the world office he thought to himself, this is great n all but what I really want to do is be a drunken homeless bum and have some long haired asshole serve me soup?
Everything you just outlined is 100% a choice. The booze, he chose. Getting in over his head, his decisions.
 

NecrosaroIII

Ask me about my terrible takes on Star Trek characters
Most of the time I'm okay, but every so often I get pissed at myself for settling in life.

I wasn't the greatest student, but managed to fumble my way through high school and did okay in college. Got a degree and tried to pursue my "dream career". For two years after college, I couldn't get a job in my chosen field because ultimately I'm not that talented. So I started planning for my back up. That failed too.

I ended up falling into an unrelated field because i had to make SOME sort of career for myself. But at best I tolerate it . On the worst days, I actively hate it. I had to watch as my college friends went on to get married, have kids and buy multiple properties, meanwhile I can't even afford a studio condo. I've done okay for myself in the long run, but I don't feel fulfilled.

I try not to think about it and embrace my role as a cog. And most of the time it's okay. I can live a nice muted life. But every so often I'm reminded that I failed.
 

StreetsofBeige

Gold Member
"If your a loser in life, you chose it."

I once met a guy in the local shelter who had been a millionaire. You think he chose to end up sitting next to me in a fuckin soup kitchen? No. He didn't. He had a run of bad luck, got in over his head and it all went to shit. When I met him he was strung out on booze and spent his days selling magazines on a street corner. You think he chose that? You think when he was sitting up there in his king of the world office he thought to himself, this is great n all but what I really want to do is be a drunken homeless bum and have some long haired asshole serve me soup?
Sounds like he made choices. That's his problem. It's like a rich guy being penniless because he blew his money in Vegas. Hey, that's his problem not everyone elses. With a boatload of cash, I'd pay off my house, pay off my investment property, upgrade my car and save the rest. Doesn't seem hard to me to control a bag of cash. That guy you spoke to somehow blew it.

Maybe if someone gets burned with health issues, or born in a crap city or country surrounded by poverty, bad government and civil war then ya you're kinda fucked unless you really make an effort beyond normal to right the ship or leave for another country.

But most people in bad situations (and we're typically talking about westerners on GAF here), inflict it themselves. We all got enough opportunity, jobs available and government support so that as long someone doesn't do something really dimwitted you can live a modest life without issues whereas a poor guy in Africa lives in a tin shack whose water well is a mile away. If that guy youre talking about was a millionaire and blew it and boozed himself into oblivion, hey most people in his situation wont do that. So it seems most people have enough control to coast the rest of their life. He didnt.

For all the naysayers that say life is rough and you're always behind the 8-ball, that's a sack of shit lie.

Put it this way. Look at all the immigrants and foreigners who come over who have modest assets, education, and probably half of them can barely speak English. They finally land and the only thing they probably know is McDonalds because those seem to be in every country in the world. If many of them can somehow make it though life or be a super success anyone can.
 
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having a family reinvigorated my purpose in life.

I like to think i had a quarterlife crisis instead of midlife..i kinda peaked early and got burnt out on my childhood dream job… so then i grew aimless and lost ambition. Didnt love the future the career held. Stopped trying to push and rather just enjoy/maintain the ride as easily and comfortably as possible. Having kids def gave me a purpose that i was looking for and reinvigorated my drive to live and be a great dad. sadly of course now i make absolutely zero time for developing my skillz and career. I still have thoughts about being semi excited about my industry or doing my own side projects, but i just lack the motivation and time anymore to truly put in the effort. 3 kids saps the life out of me and im okay with that. If i can raise 3 children to go on and live their own lives while i grow old and get forgotten about in a generation or two then i will have done my job
 

MaestroMike

Gold Member
one amazing hardworking and skillful individual can still easily get destroyed by a team. michael jordan still needed rodman and pippin. steve jobs needed wozniak. gaming industry needed nintendo in the 80s. even a group of amazing individuals can get annihilated by some larger organization. one/two/three people are specs in the sand earth is a spec in the universe it takes a well coordinated team to get anything done. humans were designed with advanced social/communication skills to work in a team to better allocate resources, time and energy. technology is helping amplify those skills within our species. just be a team player and contribute to the whole don't stress urself too much still enjoy ur hobbies and time off thats all u can do and eventually everything adds up the company you work for is still in competition with other companies if its still profitable and successful you can feel good you contributed and know that everybody eating. you can even help companies you don't work for but believe in by buying their products like nintendo games or apples vision pro next year :messenger_winking: buy shares in those companies if u want a lil piece of the pie

X0i6F4i.jpg
 

Toons

Member
No matter how hard we work, most of us won’t become billionaires. No matter hard much we train, most of us won’t make it to the NBA. Most car enthusiasts will never sit in a Bugatti Veyron, let alone ever own one. Many people want to make a difference in the world but the fact is that most of us probably won’t be remembered 200 years from now for inventing a cancer cure.

When we’re younger we’re told that if we work hard then we can do anything or be anything we want to, but for various reasons eventually everyone hits limits in life.

Was this a hard thing for you to accept? Do you believe that you really can achieve anything if you put your mind to it? Are you in the middle of a mid-life crisis right now? I would be curious to hear GAF’s thoughts on coming to terms with what you can and can’t do in life.

I'll let you know when I've hit that limit. I haven't yet, that much I know.
 

Winter John

Gold Member
Sounds like he made choices. That's his problem. It's like a rich guy being penniless because he blew his money in Vegas. Hey, that's his problem not everyone elses. With a boatload of cash, I'd pay off my house, pay off my investment property, upgrade my car and save the rest. Doesn't seem hard to me to control a bag of cash. That guy you spoke to somehow blew it.

Maybe if someone gets burned with health issues, or born in a crap city or country surrounded by poverty, bad government and civil war then ya you're kinda fucked unless you really make an effort beyond normal to right the ship or leave for another country.

But most people in bad situations (and we're typically talking about westerners on GAF here), inflict it themselves. We all got enough opportunity, jobs available and government support so that as long someone doesn't do something really dimwitted you can live a modest life without issues whereas a poor guy in Africa lives in a tin shack whose water well is a mile away. If that guy youre talking about was a millionaire and blew it and boozed himself into oblivion, hey most people in his situation wont do that. So it seems most people have enough control to coast the rest of their life. He didnt.

For all the naysayers that say life is rough and you're always behind the 8-ball, that's a sack of shit lie.

Put it this way. Look at all the immigrants and foreigners who come over who have modest assets, education, and probably half of them can barely speak English. They finally land and the only thing they probably know is McDonalds because those seem to be in every country in the world. If many of them can somehow make it though life or be a super success anyone can.
Uh huh. Why don't you tell us about the times you was a Wall St broker who lived the millionaire life
 

Synless

Member
You think the 2008 crash was his choice?
His failure to bounce back and be in the slums is his fault, flat out. Keep making excuses for this person. He failed because he chose not to get back up after he fell. He chose to become an alcoholic and limit his potential.

I won’t belabor the point. You clearly have the viewpoint that your lot in life is set. I don’t and I will only accept that the largest part of your success in life is in your control.
 

StreetsofBeige

Gold Member
Uh huh. Why don't you tell us about the times you was a Wall St broker who lived the millionaire life
I've never been a wall street broker or lived a millionaire life. I have a much more modest finance job as a career making way less money. If I can control my finances, so can a millionaire. If that guy was a wall street hot shot raking in the cash, he should know all about finance, costs and risks better than anyone.

But if someone cant control themselves despite being blessed with a super high paying job blowing it all on god knows what, that's their problem.

You think the 2008 crash was his choice?
You act as if the 2008 global crash was limited to only him. Everyone lived through it. Covid meltdown too in March 2020. Both times everyone's portfolios crashed and tons of people people lost jobs. Covid was incredible. My portfolio was dropping 15% per week. I think I was down 40% in 3 weeks by the end of March came about and the markets stabalized and rebounded. If I can live with a 40% haircut not being a millionaire with a wall street job, he should had been able to absorb the punch to the gut too.

The key difference is the vast majority who got crushed werent millionaires working high paid Wall street jobs. If they survived, so can he. But if his life crumbled into despair, being homeless and booze, that's on him. Most people didn't do that. If people making $50,000 survived, he should had been too.

By the sounds of it, he was probably some big money making big spender like the guys buying big houses and ferrraris in the movie Boiler Room. So when things go sour, it's foreclosure time as the banks claw back what people owe them. That's his bad planning and spending habits.
 
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