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[GrotesqueBeauty]

She doesn't think it's fair to get me off when she can't (or I'm unwilling to because I don't like the blood) which I can't argue with.

I'd consider this a red flag (no pun intended). Who the hell plays tit-for-tat with pleasing their partner? Not to be crude, but if she doesn't enjoy sucking your cock on its own merits from time to time your chemistry may not be all that. The same would be true if you would deny her anytime she was feeling it and you weren't in a space to join in for some reason.

On further reflection, the fact that you feel awkward about your girl catching you jerking it raises an eyebrow as well. I would personally be bummed out in your situation.

 

[Symphonia]

Yeah this is what I took issue with first too. Step up your game OP.

In another room you hear the front door close, you have time to hide it.

That, and his girlfriend getting upset about him jerking off. I bet she plugs herself when he ain't around. Double standards, man.

 

[Doctoglethorpe]

She has more parts than a vagina. Aunt Flow isn't an excuse to do nothing, its an opportunity to try new things.

 

[iBlue]

OP this doesn't count..

 

[andthebeatgoeson]

Wife came back from the doctor and said we can't have sex for six weeks.

I asked, what did the dentist say?

Amirite, op?

Boom!

 

[Servbot24]

I think I got caught by my dad once, but I'm not sure. I was standing in front of a the mirror in the bathroom, and he opened the door which was directly behind me. He then shut the door right away (as you naturally would if you opened the door to the bathroom with someone in it, no matter what the person was doing). Although he was just a few feet from me, I'm not sure if he would have been able to see anything.

Of course I couldn't finish, I flushed the toilet for some reason, then I exited and we silently crossed paths.

 

[funkypie]

must tell the internet

 

[Jigorath]

Everyone does it.

Everyone knows everyone does it.

 

[Jeevesmeister]

When I'm with a woman whose on her period its the best time in the world, because A) she's not pregnant and B) I get so many blowjobs I'm left to wonder if the OP just doesn't know how to take advantage of the situation.

 

[Hoho for breakfast]

I usually hide it from my wife too but she'd have to help me out if she ever did catch me.

And I don't do period sex. I mean other things sure but I'm not sticking my dick in that unless she asks for it. Which she doesn't.

 

[Interceptor]

She didn't help? Not even later that day?

 

[Dilly]

Time to rename to "Period Sex appreciation thread".

 

[E92 M3]

It's really fun to raw dog during the period. Makes the sex more wild. Just have disposable sheets.

 

[gaming_noob]

Links to the porn you were watching?

 

[ElectricBlanketFire]

Oh period sex? Hang on a second. Let me get the room ready:

 

[Lum1n3s]

Time to rename to "Period Sex appreciation thread".

I.. I have no clue what's going on here.

 

[Shredderi]

Wow. All the period sex loving here has quite shocked me to be honest. It's like I've accidentally descended upon a hidden vampire society that loves video games.

 

[Red]

This is why you always jerk off toward an open window, so you can see when she's back home.

 

[Dicer]

She doesn't think it's fair to get me off when she can't (or I'm unwilling to because I don't like the blood) which I can't argue with.

Red flag..

 

[Zing]

I'm not down for sailing the red sea, so no opportunity there.

She doesn't give hand or blow jobs? My condolences.

Edit: just read the reasoning. You need to strongly consider your future with this girl. Are you guys teenagers? She seems extremely petty.

 

[……forgetit]

Haven't seen the movie, but is his hand fine after that? Pretty sure punching threw a snare would give you a bloody ass hand.

On top of that it ain't easy to do.

 

[Zombine]

I don't think it counts if it's your SO. I legit thought OP was going to get caught by like his bro or mom or something and turn around and scream with his D in his hand and like accentally explode on them.

One time when I was a teen I got caught by my dad right as I was about to do it. It got everywhere and I just kind of owned it.

 

[flatearthpandas]

Wow. All the period sex loving here has quite shocked me to be honest. It's like I've accidentally descended upon a hidden vampire society that loves video games.

Lol, didn't expect it either but it makes sense. Nothing wrong with it, just be ready to do laundry. For my part, it always felt more or less the same but girls have said its more intense. There is definitely a different smell.

 

[Drazgul]

Wow. All the period sex loving here has quite shocked me to be honest. It's like I've accidentally descended upon a hidden vampire society that loves video games.

Blood for the Blood God, skulls for the Skull Throne.

 

[co1onel]

Haven't seen the movie, but is his hand fine after that? Pretty sure punching threw a snare would give you a bloody ass hand.

On top of that it ain't easy to do.

Punching the snare is probably the only part of the movie where he doesn't have bloody hands.

 

[LoveCake]

I like to make an afternoon out of it and enjoy myself.

Make an afternoon out of it, what exactly are you doing?

I thought this was going to be that the person was going to be upset, moms & dads know what goes on because they have done it etc but i am surprised there is no mention of the GF being upset the BF is watching porn, us (men) know that women know what we do but being caught in the act, seems the OP has nothing to worry about if his GF was fine with it.

 

[Alligatorjandro]

Should've pointed it at her

 

[low-G]

Thread title: "I dropped $10,000!!!"
Body: "into my bank account"

"I'm falling 5 miles!"
"With a parachute"

"I'm going to die"
"Eventually"

"I lost so much blood"
"I'm a blood donar"

"I got a girl pregnant"
"We're in a stable relationship"

"I lost my job"
"I have $10 million in savings"

 

[DeathyBoy]

I think I got caught by my dad once, but I'm not sure. I was standing in front of a the mirror in the bathroom, and he opened the door which was directly behind me. He then shut the door right away (as you naturally would if you opened the door to the bathroom with someone in it, no matter what the person was doing). Although he was just a few feet from me, I'm not sure if he would have been able to see anything.

Of course I couldn't finish, I flushed the toilet for some reason, then I exited and we silently crossed paths.

What in the world? Lock the door for fuck sake.

 

[……forgetit]

Thread title: "I dropped $10,000!!!"
Body: "into my bank account"

"I'm falling 5 miles!"
"With a parachute"

"I'm going to die"
"Eventually"

"I lost so much blood"
"I'm a blood donar"

"I got a girl pregnant"
"We're in a stable relationship"

"I lost my job"
"I have $10 million in savings"

That next to last one is still terrifying.

 

[Red Liquorice]

Make an afternoon out of it, what exactly are you doing?

Probably edging himself in to oblivion. Maybe also he likes toys, that's worth blocking an afteroon off for, edging gets pretty boring after a while.

Not that I'd know about either, just guessing....

 

[Brianimaniac]

If there is a closed door between me and a post-pubescent male, I always go out of my way to make noise as I open the door and fumble a little bit before I actually swing it open. Otherwise you're just asking for it.

 

[EchoChamber]

I remember when I was masturbating I was close to cum but my brother opened the door of the house and got so scared that I ejaculated instantly.

 

[RustyNails]

Did both of you let out a sensible chuckle?

 

[kaye]

I've both been caught and caught others doing it to me.

 

[……forgetit]

I've both been caught and caught others doing it to me.

You caught people masturbating you? What? Was it a surprise?

 

[Jawmuncher]

You caught people masturbating you? What? Was it a surprise?

Now that's a situation I want to see play out.

 

[legacyzero]

Glad she didn't over-react. Here locally to me in Wisconsin, a lady stabbed her boyfriend for catching him with porn and masturbating.

Dude, this is when she is at her horniest. Bloody up that sword of yours like you were William Wallace in Braveheart.

Hate to say it, but this dude gets it. Fire up the shower breh.

OP labeled as mysoginistic for not wanting to 'sail the red sea' in 3...2...1...

Is this a thing??

 

[kaye]

You caught people masturbating you? What? Was it a surprise?

Suppose. A bit awkward. I can relate to the feelings and urges of the kid and all, being attracted to girls, but I just wanted to sit in my car and enjoy my pizza and garlic bread in peace, not turn around and see him full cranking it at me

Got out of there rather quick.

 

[-Horizon-]

Not exactly EightBitNate levels of awkward, but when she walked in the door I nearly had a heart attack.

I leave disappointed then.

 

[RustyNails]

Is this a thing??

Someone never heard of The Red Wedding

 

[markofhavoc]

I remember when I had a problem with sex during her period, life was hard at 16. I'm not going a week without sex because of a little blood, throw a condom on if you don't already and are freaking out from it

 

[……forgetit]

Suppose. A bit awkward. I can relate to the feelings and urges of the kid and all, being attracted to girls, but I just wanted to sit in my car and enjoy my pizza and garlic bread in peace, not turn around and see him full cranking it at me

Got out of there rather quick.

Oh, gotcha.

 

[BeforeU]

she didnt offer you a hand?

Ask her for hand or head.

 

[ElectricBlanketFire]

I remember when I had a problem with sex during her period, life was hard at 16. I'm not going a week without sex because of a little blood, throw a condom on if you don't already and are freaking out from it

Have you considered the woman may not be comfortable having sex while on her period?

 

[breakfuss]

Dude, this is when she is at her horniest. Bloody up that sword of yours like you were William Wallace in Braveheart.

Awful

 

[markofhavoc]

Have you considered the woman may not be comfortable having sex while on her period?

I've been with her over six years, it's quite the opposite.

 

[ElectricBlanketFire]

I've been with her over six years, it's quite the opposite.

I'm not talking about your specific partner.

 

[breakfuss]

I'm not talking about your specific partner.

To be fair that's been my experience as well. Im not sure of its hormonal or something. I still think it's fucking nasty but to each their own. Thats what showers are for I guess.

 

[True Savior]

I dont understand the story.